The Slice: There is nothing wrong with your television

For the next hour, sit quietly and we will control all that you see and hear.

Actually, it won’t take that long to read this column. But if you can identify that introduction, there might be a coveted reporter’s notebook in it for you.

Let’s move on.

Your pet’s mission statement: “Abby’s our 8-year-old blue heeler/mutt,” wrote Ellen Sherriffs. “Her mission statement is very clear in her mind: She needs to keep us in line. She needs to walk us every day. The leash keeps us from wandering into traffic.”

Here’s the mission statement of cats named Pete and Kate, who live with Dave and Anne Albrecht.

“To eat, sleep and play as much as possible while magnanimously receiving affection from our loyal subjects.”

Sally Kuchik’s cats have mission statements that are somewhat at odds.

Mickey: Find a place in the sun to snooze.

Achilles: Don’t let Mickey snooze anywhere.

Double features: The Slice asked readers to name their top 10 favorite movies. I picked a couple each from a few readers’ lists.

“The Shawshank Redemption” and “Saving Private Ryan.” – Mike Luzynski

“It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World” and “The Russians are Coming, the Russians are Coming.” – Ernie Durfee

“The Best Years of Our Lives” and “Coming Home.” – Cathy Kraus

“The Godfather” and “The Godfather II.” – submitted on behalf of her late husband, Robert Glatzer, by Mary Ann Murphy

“The Postman” and “The Astronaut’s Wife.” – Janet Culbertson

“Casablanca” and “North by Northwest.” – Bill Reichert

“An Affair to Remember” and “Breakfast at Tiffany’s.” – Gary Clizer

Slice answers: Paul Mackey estimated that up in his neck of the woods about 80 percent of the drivers causing accidents say they swerved to miss a deer. “Yeah, right,” he said.

Tony Myers remembers watching Jerry McCumber and the test pattern on the family’s first TV.

And Wayne Sanders reported that the oldest item in his fridge is a jar of sweet relish with a use-by date of April 2014.

Warm-up question: What old TV show was the worst when it came to stunt doubles who didn’t really look like the actors for whom they were standing in?

Today’s Slice questions: Where does autumn rank in your list of favorite seasons? Where would it rank if you lived in Australia?

Write The Slice at P. O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. Tom Bacon suggested the Florida version of The Slice (Monday’s column) could obsessively refer to nutria.