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Dear Kiantha: Turn collective trauma into commitment to community and safety

Dear Kiantha,

They were children. The community of Uvalde, Texas, will never be the same and in truth neither will I. How do we move forward when things like this continue to happen in our country?

Dear Never the Same,

On the night of May 24, I lay down for bed emotionally exhausted. My eyes red and burning from all the crying and wiping I had done the entire day. I had no words. I could not articulate what I was feeling as I could not form complete sentences. The only sound I could produce was a deep chest moan to signify all of the sadness and pain I felt and continue to feel.

I, like you, will never be the same. The trauma we collectively experience each time these unfathomable murders happen changes us at our core. The feelings of anger, fear and helplessness render us wounded in our spirits. Each time a tragedy like this happens in our nation we are left spinning in a cycle of “ifs.” What if this person would have done “this,” or that person had done “that”?

What if conservatives would have passed stricter gun legislation after the last time something like this happened? What if liberals would stop standing in the way of police protecting our children and teachers in the schools? What if teachers were armed? What if the first responders would have responded differently, more decisively? Could any of this had been prevented?

While these are all reasonable questions in the wake of a situation of this magnitude, our desire to hold someone, some system accountable does not lessen the trauma we are all experiencing.

Moving forward gets tougher every time. Finding light at the end of these dark tunnels becomes more difficult after each catastrophic event.

This is our is truth and there is no neat way to wrap our minds around our seemingly dark reality.

As we sit in the aftermath of this heinous event, we must continue to hold tightly to the belief that as a country we are better than this.

Our country will continue to mourn in the months to come and our collective hearts will remain broken until we can decide together how to make our collective safety a shared value. Even then, we cannot bring back the 21 lives lost, but we can honor them by allowing their lives and deaths to propel us into a deeper commitment to community and safety for all.

Soul to Soul,

Kiantha

Dear Kiantha can be read Fridays in The Spokesman-Review. To read this column in Spanish, visit www.spokesman.com. To submit a question, please email DearKiantha@gmail.com.

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