Front Porch: Feeling pride in June and all year

I am the mother of a gay son.

It’s been nearly 20 years since I first wrote those words in this column. That was back when some forward strides for same-sex unions appeared to be gaining traction. It was always two steps forward, one step back, but it was rolling in the direction of recognition for the human right of legal marriage for people in the LGBTQ community.

That’s both a too-broad and understated comment. Nothing rolled. It was fought for, pushed, marched, demonstrated, legal action taken, and bled and died for.

When I first wrote about my youngest son Sam (with his permission), domestic partnerships had become legal in Washington state.

Yet to come was 2011, when Washington’s Native American Suquamish Tribe approved granting same-sex marriage, and 2012, when Washington Gov. Christine Gregoire signed into law the legalization of same-sex marriage in our state (a protesting group called for a referendum, which later that year saw the voters approve same-sex marriage).

A little way farther down the road came the transformative Obergefell vs. Holmes Supreme Court ruling in 2015 which legalized same-sex marriage in all 50 states.

And now on the horizon is the shadow that Obergefell is likely to come under challenge.

Clearly, the fight never ends.

June is Gay Pride Month in America. Much of this month’s parades and celebrations have been overshadowed by national and international events, especially the Middle East, immigration and economic issues that are causing sleepless nights for those on the left and right of the political spectrum.

So, before the month ends, I would like to take a moment to pay tribute to Spokane’s Pride Parade, a pretty happy and celebratory happening that drew thousands to Riverfront Park downtown on June 14. Not without a few organizational bumps on the way and a few protesters present (as always, I’m afraid), it was a joyful celebration of self.

There are other things taking place during the month, but the parade is most visible to the public.

My husband and I attended a Pride Parade in Seattle with Sam when he was around 19 or so and a student at the University of Washington. Sam is now well into his 40s, so it was certainly a while ago.

I’m not sure what I was expecting exactly, but what I discovered was how family-centered it was. Sure, there were some eye-opening wardrobes and excesses, but it was lesbian couples walking with their mothers, kids in strollers being pushed along by parents of assorted ethnicities and sexual identities, men holding hands and drag queens being ever so fabulous.

There was singing and dancing. It was fun, and it made me proud – not of our son, of whom we were already proud – but of a community of families and friends who happily showed with pride the many shapes and dimensions of their community. And, of course, that all families don’t look alike.

The parades began nationally in 1970, in commemoration of the Stonewall riots the year before, when on June 28, 1969, police raided the Stonewall Inn, a gay club in Greenwich Village, New York City. On that night, bar patrons, neighbors and bar staff rioted in the street for a total of six days, protesting police treatment. Nobody was killed in the riots, it should be noted.

What began in four cities in America in 1970 spread across the globe, with LGBTQ pride observations held worldwide in in the month of June. Hats off to Canada, which holds a full Pride Season, June-September.

The parades, in fact, began as a protest, but transitioned into celebrations and a reminder that all families may well include LGBTQ members, who, sadly, may still be fearful of acceptance by those closest to them. And violence against this community continues today.

Sam and our son-in-law Ryan have been married for nearly six of the 10 years they’ve been together. They make their home in Seattle and are both good men who work and contribute to the larger Seattle community in assorted ways. They hold on to each other dearly and value their marriage mightily.

We are proud of them year-round.

Voices correspondent Stefanie Pettit can be reached by email at upwindsailor@comcast.net.