From Paris with … ennui

It’s a new weekend with a new lineup of films to go see. The three that we’ve chosen to tackle for the next edition of “Movies 101” are “The Wolfman,” “The Private Lives of Pippa Lee” and the HBO offering “Temple Grandin.”

Choosing “The Wolfman” was an easy decision. Benicio Del Toro, Anthony Hopkins and Emily Blunt, directed by Joe Johnston (the guy who gave us “The Rocketeer” and “October Sky”)? No problem. I’m not sure about “Private Lives of Pippa,” though since it’s playing at the Magic Lantern I’m willing to give it a chance. And the HBO movie “Temple Grandin”? Hey, it’s better than, say, “Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief.”

I did go to see “From Paris with Love” the other day, and even as a guilty pleasure that European attempt at American neo-noir sensibilities couldn’t cut it. French types need to quit aping what they think of as the School of Tarantino and stick with what they know: eating and endless dinner conversation. Only Brits such as Guy Ritchie know how to do crime films with any real sense of European style.

The guy who directed the film, Pierre Morel, also gave us the Liam Neeson action flick “Taken.” Which wasn’t all that bad, even as it ended up taking a bath in gore and violence (also set in Paris, which hasn’t seen this much bloodletting since the death of Princess Diana). So for the first 20 minutes or so, the film seems to be headed in an interesting direction.

But other than the fact that you can spot the villain from the get-go, the film’s main problem - along with its generic script - is Jonathan Rhys Meyers. Not only does Rhys Meyers sport a new set of choppers (designed, no doubt, to give him an even bigger international career), but he affects a decent American accent. Neither, though, can make up for the fact that, one, he can’t act and, two, he has all the sex appeal of a gerbil.

Oh, the aging Vinnie Barbarino does his best to keep us involved. With his hair shaved to make him look like a caucasian LL Cool J (without the rock-hard abs), Vinnie - or, I should say, John Travolta - tries to comes across as a Steven Seagal who can act. But he’s just not that good an actor, and even the so-far-over-the-hill-that-he-can’t-get-it-up Seagal is still a more believable action star.

In the end, “From Paris with Love” doesn’t show much of Paris, and it certainly doesn’t provide much love. Which makes it about as entertaining as a deflated souffle. Or a three-day-old baguette. Or a marmot quiche.

Nah, delete that last one. It sounds fairly intriguing. At least original.

Below : The trailer for “From Paris with Love.”