Naming a new superhero

So I’m walking into an assisted living community near Sacred Heart.

I’m carrying a 12-pack of toilet paper.

A guy who works there sees me and notices what I have under my arm.

“TP Man,” he says.

I smile. I’ve been called worse.

In fact, I sort of like the sound of it. Makes me think of a lesser comic-book hero.

But let’s not speculate about what TP Man’s super powers might be.