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The Slice: Forecast calls for a break from local TV news

Fri., June 10, 2011, midnight

Breaking up is never easy.

So I’ll just go ahead and say it. The fault here is not with Spokane TV news.

It’s me. I’m the one to blame in our long, troubled relationship.

But the time has come for me to stop watching the local news. And rather than trying to scale back or ration my viewing, I have decided to break it off completely.

It will be better that way. Clean, neat – over.

It’s the end of an era, really. I’ve gotten countless column items from watching Spokane TV news over the years.

No more.

Now I freely admit that the reason for this split-up reflects a personal quirk and is woefully out of step with the prevailing Spokane attitude.

You see, I like to decide for myself what is or isn’t a nice day, weatherwise. And I have no wish to be lumped in with those pandered-to human mood rings in the audience who can’t handle a rainy day or soil themselves when confronted with snow.

That’s just me. I realize I am in the minority.

But please don’t misinterpret this as across-the-board bashing of local TV news. It’s not.

They do some good stuff. And I’ve actually met a fair number of people who work in TV news here. With just two or three exceptions, I have found them to be bright and personable.

I would suggest that those folks now have my full permission to no longer read The Slice, but I suspect some might have already availed themselves of that option.

So there it is. Me and watching local TV news? History.

I’ll try to remember the good times.

Oh, sure, there will be temptation to come crawling back. You know, “I’m sorry, I didn’t know what I was saying. Please forget what I said!”

But I’ll try to be strong. For both of us.

Because breaking up is for the best. Counseling would be a waste of time.

I don’t expect the on-camera people to start reining in their gushing about hot, sunny days or tamp down the panic-stations reaction to winter by tacking on awkward qualifiers.

Like I said, I’m the problem.

Today’s Slice question: Is Spokane’s Martin Alcorn the only one around here capable of feeling guilty about doing nothing?

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email Ask your doctor if you are healthy enough for sexual activity lasting more than four hours.

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