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The Slice: You ain’t nothin’ but a Marmot
If the Elvis movies were remade with all-marmot casts, the storylines wouldn’t have to change much.
“Love Me Tender”: A sensitive rodent’s older brother returns from the Civil War.
“Loving You”: A young rock chuck ’n’ roller learns about life and love.
“Jailhouse Rock”: Animal inmates sing and dance.
“King Creole”: Marmots in the Big Easy.
“GI Blues”: Singing rodent adjusts to life in the Army.
“Flaming Star”: Stripped to the waist, marmots ride horses.
“Wild in the Country”: Animals behaving like animals.
“Blue Hawaii”: Marmots whirl and hop in floral shirts.
“Follow That Dream”: Spokane marmots play the lottery.
“Kid Galahad”: Furry creature climbs into the boxing ring.
“Girls! Girls! Girls!”: Boy marmots cavort during spring break.
“It Happened At The World’s Fair”: Burrow-based fun at Expo ’74.
“Fun in Acapulco”: Cliff-diving marmots in Mexico.
“Kissin’ Cousins”: The raw truth about animal husbandry.
“Viva Las Vegas”: Rodents have a swingin’ time in Sin City.
“Roustabout”: Circus marmot learns about love under the big top.
“Girl Happy”: One of God’s creatures feels the need to breed.
“Tickle Me”: A tourist at Riverfront Park loses a finger.
“Harum Scarum”: Standard marmots and Arabs fare.
“Frankie and Johnny”: Toothsome antics on a riverboat.
“Paradise, Hawaiian Style”: Marmots throw a luau.
“Spinout”: Rodents chew up hoses in race cars.
“Easy Come, Easy Go”: Songs and sighing.
“Double Trouble”: Sighing and songs.
“Clambake”: Marmots party down.
“Stay Away, Joe”: A marmot named Joe is told to stay away.
“Speedway”: Marmots wear helmets and crash.
“Live a Little, Love a Little”: Marmots get existential.
“Charro!”: Rodents go nuts with exclamation points!
“The Trouble With Girls”: Marmots date, hilarity ensues.
“Change of Habit”: A marmot who is a doctor falls for a marmot nun.
Today’s Slice question: What’s it like having the same birthday as Elvis?