The Slice: ‘Spokane County man’ is at it again
It has been a bit of a rough patch for “Spokane County man” lately.
At least when he is described with those exact words in headlines and articles saved in the archives of The Spokesman-Review.
First, he was “suspected in a stabbing.”
Then, in a bad move, he “wired nearly $20,000 to Peru.”
Still, you have to give him credit for the fact that he “followed a burglary suspect.”
But then, darn the luck, he was “caught with stolen vehicles at his South Hill-area home.”
Spokane County man just can’t seem to stay out of trouble. I mean, who can forget when he “was booked into jail early Wednesday after he allegedly made death threats and attempted to head-butt a Spokane sheriff’s deputy”?
Of course, it hasn’t all been blue skies and green lights for his common-law companion either. Ladies and gentlemen, say hello to “Spokane County woman.”
There was the time she “told sheriff’s deputies a burglar cleaned out her coin collections and spoons from all over the world.”
And it was not exactly a red-letter day when she “sent $3,000 to a con man claiming to be her grandson.”
Though who hasn’t done that?
Still, it had to sting when she was “sentenced for Medicaid fraud.”
There’s more. What do you suppose she wrote in her diary after a headline said she was “shot, hurt in fight at party”?
You get the feeling she wants to do the right thing. Then you read that she was “charged with the same kind of identity theft activities that sent her to prison two years ago.”
Ouch. But hey, it’s tough all over. Consider Idaho’s fun couple, “Kootenai County man” and the lovely “Kootenai County woman.”
He was “sought in Oxycontin theft.”
And she was “Idaho’s first confirmed case” of a disease you definitely don’t want.
It doesn’t end there. The Inland Northwest is full of colorful characters. Consider “Stevens County man.”
He got in hot water with some nit-pickers for “voting twice.”
Can you imagine? Compared to some of the stuff he’s pulled, that’s nothing.
Today’s Slice question: Ever heard “Don’t plant your garden while there’s still snow on Mount Spokane”?
Write The Slice at P. O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email firstname.lastname@example.org. At least one local third-grade teacher instructs her pupils in the classics — lines from “Rocky and Bullwinkle.”