August 29, 2014 in Features

The Slice: When you head to the park, try picking up more than just food

By The Spokesman-Review

Let’s start with a few Pig Out pick-up lines.

“Eat here often?” – Keith Hegg

“Weren’t you an extra in that zombie TV series?” – Jon Etherton

“Well, we have gluttony covered, what do you think of lust?” – Cathy Harris

“You don’t want to know the guitar player, you want to know me.” – Karen Mobley

And Sue Chapin shared this. “Younger daughter Andrea was a resident adviser for her living group in college. One of the new freshmen boys attempted to make conversation with her in the dining hall one day and his opening line was, ‘You have a lot of food on your plate.’

“Andrea used that as a teaching moment about how not to talk to girls. That line might be more effective at Pig Out.”

Signed confessions: Dee Hargitt and Sheri McEachran sent me emails in which they admitted to having had a taste for paste early in their school days.

Doesn’t seem to have hurt them.

Slice answer: “Growing up, my mom would warn that if I ever committed a crime, witnesses would always be able to identify me by my flaming red hair,” wrote Patti Baird. “This only caused me to dream of my own imagined crime spree using the nickname The Red Rage.”

Say and spell: The word Hayley Murdock mispronounces in her head to help her spell it correctly is “definitely.” She hears it as “De-Fine-ite-ly.”

Liz Cox and Laurie Kulp do that with the word “beautiful.”

An incident in the fourth grade still makes Penni Barringer hear “fri-end” in her head when she spells “friend.”

Mary Ann Barney tried this tactic with “hors d’oeuvres” but she still has trouble remembering how to spell it. Who doesn’t? So she came up with a solution.

“Now I just write ‘appetizers.’ ”

Good idea.

A second opinion on whether having short hair is a time saver: “My mom and girlfriends all agree that long hair is much easier and faster to style,” wrote Tammy Reed.

Today’s Slice question: Do you attend more weddings or more funerals?

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email Football fans seem to tolerate the steady stream of injuries to players without losing a great deal of sleep.

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