The Slice: Utensil intelligence explained

TUESDAY, FEB. 18, 2014

What does your attitude about chopsticks say about you?

• That I am a cosmopolitan person of the world.

• That I am a hipster doofus.

• That I am apt to say “ ’Murican” with no trace of humor.

• That I simply prefer a dining implement that allows me to shovel it in faster.

• That I am willing to try new things.

• That I don’t really understand what makes someone a socialist.

• That I am already an expert at using a fork.

• That I am a little affected.

• That you can pry my fork from cold, dead hand …

• That I am part of the future.

• That I do not trust Asia, especially China.

• That I don’t care what the other people at the table think.

• That I am trying to impress my date.

• Not a thing, really.

Identify which of the following are not teams in minor league baseball’s Class-A Northwest League: A) Eugene Emeralds. B) Ellensburg Ellens. C) Tri-City Dust Devils. D) Gresham Tonyas. E) Hillsboro Hops. F) Pullman-Moscow Hyphens. G) Everett AquaSox. H) Penticton Ticks. I) Boise Hawks. J) Moses Lake Marmot Sox. K) Spokane Indians. L) Pendleton Shirts. M) Salem-Keizer Volcanoes. N) Wenatchee Apple Maggots. O) Vancouver Canadians. P) Bend Overs. Q) Castlegar Moats. R) Bellingham Hammers. S) Panhandle Handlers.

Find answers below today’s Slice question.

Good Views Department: “Before retirement I was a registrar at Providence Sacred Heart in the Heart Institute,” wrote Russell Wecker. “The back wall of the office are the windows on the north side of the fifth floor. Totally unobstructed 180 degree view from the top of Sunset Hill to Stateline and beyond and Canadian border (almost anyway) to the north. Hard to top that. I caught many breathtaking sunrises and storm fronts as they moved through the area.”

Today’s Slice question: How much of your recollection of the great works of literature is actually based on having paged through Classics Illustrated comic books back when you were a kid?

B, D, F, H, J, L, N, P, Q, R and S are not real teams.

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. It’s not unheard of for “Girl Scout cookies” and “street value” to appear in the same sentence.

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