February 21, 2014 in Features

The Slice: Love letters you don’t need to write

By The Spokesman-Review

What’s a federal offense when there’s romance to facilitate?

A woman who once had several tenants told about playing matchmaker by intentionally mixing up their mail and giving a certain shy gentleman an excuse to knock on the door of a certain woman.

It worked.

Things farm kids learn: “A work ethic.” – Mike Carlson

“Not to be squeamish about blood.” – Bruce Werner

“The science of scatology.” – Sherri Crisp

“Trucks are for work.” – Troy and Tawnya Rux

Seat assignment stories: Lucy Jeanne was traveling with her elderly father. A check-in agent at the airport informed them that they would not be able to sit together.

A few minutes later there was an announcement at the gate. It was a request that the passenger traveling with her father return to the check-in counter.

When Jeanne got there, the agent said he was going to seat her next to her father after all, even if the shuffling of seat assignments annoyed another passenger or two.

“I hope when I am his age that my daughter treats me like you treat your father,” he said. “Right now, it’s not looking real good – she’s 13.”

As Jeanne and her father left that area to board the plane, her father called to the agent. “Don’t worry, it gets better.”

One more. Sandy Moore was traveling because of a death in the family. Tickets were booked at the last minute. The plane was full.

Moore was able to sit next to her 2-year-old, but no one wanted to swap seats so that her 4-year-old son could also sit next to her. That worked out all right.

“I laughed to myself during the long flight as (a few rows away) my chatty 4-year-old kept his seatmates fully engaged.”

Meantime, she and the toddler relaxed. “Best flight with little kids ever.”

Slice answer: If John Knadler had a sit-down with his guardian angel, there would be lots to talk about. “I grew up in rural Montana during the years of the $5 speeding ticket,” he wrote.

It was not much of a deterrent.

Today’s Slice question: Ever heard a dirty joke that was actually funny?

Write The Slice at P. O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. Is perfect attendance overrated?

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