Huckleberries: Gonzaga lover slam-dunks ‘Caveman’ with his attitude about athletic women

Trustee Christa Hazel of the Coeur d’Alene School Board had a close encounter with a “Caveman” at a checkout counter of a local store the other day.

It began with the male cashier praising the Gonzaga women’s basketball team. He was singing to the choir, as far as Gonzaga lover Christa was concerned. But the guy behind her muttered.

“Yeah,” sneered the Caveman, “but the men’s team was better.” When Christa and the cashier agreed that both teams performed well, our Fred Flintstone continued: “I just think it’s unnatural for women to play that sport. Just not right.”

Christa looked to see if Mr. Flintstone was teasing. But he was stern and serious. So, smiling, she said: “Yeah, those women should be barefoot and in the kitchen.” The cashier smirked. Again, Freddy F: “It’s just, I don’t know, different.” Smiling again, Christa grabbed her bags and said ere she walked out of sight: “Yeah, it’s probably cuz of all the boobs and stuff.”

Game, set, match, to Christa.

Can I ‘quote’ you?

Huckleberries can spell “quote” – or “unquote” or “misquote” for that matter – which puts this column ahead of the curve in Idaho. According to Google Trends, “quote” is the most misspelled word in the Gem State, making Idaho one of six states that regularly botches a five-letter word. Oregon is the other Northwest state to do so. Oregonians trip up over “sense,” which many suspect isn’t common in weird Portland. Elsewhere in the Northwest, Washington is one of four states that mangle “pneumonia.” Montana and Wyoming tap out on “surprise” and “priority,” respectively. Huckleberries, meanwhile, wished it had a nickel for every time it misspelled “nickle.”

Huckleberries

Poet’s Corner: “Be sure to recall/ before striking the blow – / they come down real fast,/ but they go up real slow” – Tom Wobker, The Bard of Sherman Avenue (“Cutting Trees,” July 15, 2015) … Huckleberry Friend Walkabout saw something new last week during her daily cleanup tour of Tubbs Hill: a yellow-and-black deer target taped to a tree along the trail. No telling what the genius who put it there had in mind … How thick are the milkshakes at Paul Bunyan restaurant, next to The Spokesman-Review building in Coeur d’Alene? So thick, says Katrina Wright Swaim, that she and hubby, Paul, “almost caved in our faces trying to drink them” recently. Yum … Bonner County educator Rick Price says the best milkshakes in the Panhandle are poured at the Elmira Store: “Hard ice cream served in a cup with a metal mixing cup so you get it all!” … Quotable Quote: “I’m glad I got married before the world turned on cargo shorts. I have several pairs and I’m not giving them up. Freedom!!” – Intermax President Mike Kennedy of Coeur d’Alene … Overheard at Lilac City Comicon last weekend (by S-R colleague Jesse Tinsley): Question: “Are you dressed up as Shaggy or Scooby Doo?” Answer: “No.” Ouch.

Parting Shot

Coeur d’Alene native Sandy Emerson responds to that video of the recent teen brawl on Tubbs Hill that went viral (over 1 million views, according to KREM 2): “There were fights in City Park at the ‘slab dances,’ usually when Spokane kids came over looking for trouble. But I don’t ever remember anything like this on Tubbs. Not even during the hydro races (1960s) when it was packed and some beer was consumed.” Here’s hoping the Parting Shot has no relation to the item above about the deer target.