Woman Told Her Story To S-R, But Didn’t Bank On Readers’ Reaction

In December 1991, I was featured in a story about people who received help from the Spokane Food Bank. I had just gone through a divorce and, like happens to many women, I went from middle-class to struggling. I never thought I would end up needing food from a food bank, but there I was and I talked about how this felt to writer Jamie Tobias Neely. My daughter’s picture ran with the story. She was 4 at the time.

Though the story was accurate, I now regret that I ever appeared in the newspaper. I wanted to share these feelings with journalists at The Spokesman-Review so when I read an announcement that the newspaper was looking for people who had been written about, I called. That’s how I ended up at a forum with about 31 other people, including several reporters and editors.

I regretted doing the article because after it ran, a dozen total strangers called with offers of help. I felt vulnerable, exposed and pitied.

There was one valuable outcome. A woman I met because of the story asked if I could help her find someone at SFCC where I was in school at the time. She had lost touch with him. I was able to help her find the man and the two are now married!

At the forum, as I listened to others explain the long-term effects of being in the newspaper, I wondered if they had found the experience a growing one, as I did. Growth is often painful. Getting a look at myself as a subject in an article about the Food Bank was not at all comfortable for me; some very direct self-evaluation came about.

My regret for having done the article had nothing to do with Jamie Neely and everything to do with the fact I had to look at some unpleasant reflections of myself. Even though some in the room blamed reporters and editors, I believe the trouble was that the articles written about them made them take a harsh look at themselves.

The reporters and editors at the forum were either truly interested in those of us who came to share our feelings or they did an awesome job of faking it. I was impressed.

My advice to anyone approached by the media for an interview is to realize you can say no, period. Or you can set boundaries about how much you are willing to expose about yourself. Don’t be intimidated by reporters. They are just doing their jobs, but it is your story.

The following fields overflowed: CREDIT = Marilyn Hart Special to Perspective