Some People Too Quick To Side With Runaways

Wed., May 24, 1995

Sally Anderson Special To Opinion

Now more than ever, I try to walk a mile in the other person’s shoes before I judge.

Yet, every article I read about runaways seems to have been written by a well-meaning person who hasn’t been there.

How many runaways really come from abusive families? If we were to line up 25 runaways and call their parents, could they go home? Could it be that if they went home, they would have rules and boundaries? They would be asked to go to school and stay in class - and not to steal from their parents and to speak with their parents with respect.

My son started to run away at age 15. No, he’s not from an abusive home. We are not from a bad neighborhood. We are not poor. He was and is loved very much.

He chose to run. He feels that life is easier with no rules. He learned from friends and school what rights he has, what his parents can or can’t do.

The first time he ran away, we had restricted him for two weeks because he had gotten straight F’s. I called police but found they could do nothing.

He also ran away when I asked him to wash the car and he didn’t feel like it. It went on and on.

We worked with doctors. We worked with counselors. We had him placed in a crisis residential center three times. But when he was released for making no attempt to change, his best friend’s father used his influence to have our son placed back in the center - five hours later.

Neighbors took him in. Never did one call and ask our side of the story.

He would live for three or four months with a friend; then he would move. His school counselor shielded him from consequences. He quit school at age 16, and we can’t make him go back.

Why should these kids change when they are not accountable for their actions? Society continues to enable their behavior.

Think of the agencies set up for these kids, along with all the well-meaning people taking them in. How many of these kids have loving parents with broken hearts? How many could and should go home?

The “Becca Bill” is a start. Maybe if the law had held our son accountable for his actions the first time he ran away, he would have thought twice before running away again. Just maybe, if it weren’t so easy for these kids, they’d be in school, off the streets and home where they belong.

MEMO: “Your turn” is a feature of the Wednesday and Saturday Opinion pages. To submit a column for consideration, call Rebecca Nappi/459-5496 or Doug Floyd/459-5466.

“Your turn” is a feature of the Wednesday and Saturday Opinion pages. To submit a column for consideration, call Rebecca Nappi/459-5496 or Doug Floyd/459-5466.

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