Big Words Trouble For Little Mouth

Gadzooks! What’s going on in our schools? Seems a Coeur d’Alene third-grader got a mouthful as part of the nutrition curriculum, sponsored by Tidyman’s and the Lake City High cheerleaders. Grade schoolers are taught about food content, nutritional value, calories and apparently more. Much more. The 9-year-old boy arrived home excited last week and informed his startled mother that he’d met cheerleaders and eaten fruit - and bikinis. His mother hopes he meant zucchinis. But who knows these days?

Stacked deck?

A question posed Thursday in The Slice, Paul Turner’s column, had ‘em scrambling at Kootenai Medical Center. Asked Paul: “Which Inland Northwest hospital cafeteria serves the best food?” Not long after the S-R hit doorsteps, KMC circulated a memo suggesting, half in jest, that employees call in and stack the ballot in favor of their own chow wagon. (Hey, it’d get my vote without twisting my arm.)

Thumbs down

Dave Walker (“walker@iea.com”), 40, and a Coeur d’Alene native, offered an interesting critique of the hydroplane issue earlier this month on the Internet. He’s a big hydro fan but told net surfers reluctantly he doesn’t support their return to Lake Coeur d’Alene. Wrote Walker: “The biggest single problem is the plain and simple fact that CdA Lake and the city are not laid out in a manner that is conducive to hydro racing. Whether you argue that the race should be held in its old site … or east of town … NEITHER location has the facilities nor the parking that is needed for an event of this size.”

Tax-code weddings

Idaho Congressman Helen Chenoweth raised feminist hackles last week by saying the sisters have arrived - not just come a long way, baby. But she’s not so sure about single folks. Helen, who is divorced, told Our Woman In Boise that she’s planning legislation to make income tax withholding the same for singles and marrieds. Said she: “It is very inequitable. Most people can hardly believe it that it is still tilted. I don’t think we should use the power of the tax code to encourage people into marriage.” (In Idaho, we use shotguns.)

Defending her honor

Well, they’re not about to poke him in the nose but two powerful Idaho pols didn’t like House Speaker Newt Gingrich snubbing Our Miss Chenoweth. Newt canceled a campaign trip to Boise on Helen’s behalf after she voted against him on a budget issue. U.S. Sen. Larry Craig demanded an apology. Meanwhile, state House Majority Leader Bruce Newcomb stopped Helen at the state Capitol to say: “You oughta tell Newt he’s losing a little credibility in Idaho.” Helen laughed and agreed: “They don’t like their women biffed around in Idaho.” That’s “dissed,” dear.

Huckleberries

A photo apparently is worth 10,000 dollars - or at least it is if OSHA detects a construction violation. Apparently, the eagle-eyed feds saw last week’s photo in the S-R of crews constructing the new Wal-Mart store at Ponderay. The safety police got out their fine book after noticing the work wasn’t being done exactly according to Hoyle. … A crime reported to Coeur d’Alene police last week should get the surviving Beatles nervous: Two guitars, valued at $700, were stolen from a residence - in the 4200 block of Abbey Road. … Only an old Boy Scout like Trustee Ed Adamchak would stop a Post Falls School Board meeting to put the American and Idaho flags in their proper places. Salute.

Parting shot

Hydroplane hawker John McGruder claims one third of us want the thunderboats back, one third don’t and the final third aren’t sure how they feel. He might be right about the first third. But I haven’t met anyone who’s sitting on the fence. The remaining two-thirds don’t want anything to do with this cockamamie scheme. McGruder would know that if he’d quit believing everything he reads in the Hagadone Hospitality public relations sheet.

, DataTimes MEMO: Gotta Huckleberry? Call the Huckleberry Hound: (800) 344-6718 or (208) 765-7125. Or fax: (208) 765-7149.

The following fields overflowed: CREDIT = D.F. Oliveria The Spokesman-Review