Campaign ‘96

By now, the election’s winners have recovered from their celebrations and the losers from their wakes. There are no candidates to catch, no political dates to mark, no weekly Web Sites to worry about.

There’s only one thing left to do before this election season is relegated to the ash heap of history: Hand out awards for the best and worst of Campaign ‘96.

The George Armstrong Custer Trophy for the worst strategy of 1996 goes to the Ellen Craswell campaign, which claimed with a straight face, up to the end, that victories in Eastern Washington could overcome Gary Locke’s margins in Seattle. Not only was it bad math - there just aren’t enough votes to do it - Craswell lost Spokane and several of the East Side’s more populous counties.

A Piltdown Man Statuette for the most questionable research goes to Democrat Judy Olson’s staff, which was unaware of the difference between the numbers for recorded House votes and the official numbers for bills or resolutions. The position papers her campaign prepared on top issues used the wrong set of numbers, allowing Rep. George Nethercutt to accuse her of not knowing what she was talking about.

The Cold Fusion Award for poor scholarship in the pursuit of a dubious goal is given to Gonzaga University’s Young Democrats, for holding a press conference to denounce Nethercutt’s purchase of a house near Washington, D.C. It was bad enough they had trouble articulating where exactly a member of Congress should live while performing his elective duties some 3,000 miles away. But the color picture they had of the house they described as “plush” and “in a bourgeois neighborhood” wasn’t even the house Nethercutt bought. Better luck studying for next month’s finals.

The Willie Horton Plaque, for the most negative ads, goes to the John Moyer re-election campaign and the state GOP, for their late October hit-pieces trying to paint Democrat Rep. Lisa Brown as favoring child molesters near schools. The GOP pit bulls apparently realized they were unable to win nice, so they opted to lose ugly.

And speaking of ugly, the Technicolor Yawn Award for the worst use of color goes to the state AFL-CIO, for its early November mailing to women voters. The “Nethercutt Means Trouble” brochure was awash in colors that haven’t been seen since Haight-Ashbury in the 1960s. Maybe it was designed to camouflage the fact that the brochure was wrong on a key point: It implied Nethercutt voted against health-care reforms on insurance portability and pre-existing conditions. He didn’t.

A Waiting for Godot Citation for keeping up a good front goes to the underfunded Washington state Dole/Kemp campaign. Officials talked about a media blitz early on, then repeatedly revised their schedules for when it would appear. First it was coming after the conventions. Then it was after the first debate, then the last debate and finally, never. All resources were shifted south to California, leaving the Washington folks to claim they didn’t need TV ads because their mailings and grass-roots efforts would do the trick.

A Leo Durocher Was Wrong Citation for proving wrong the adage about nice people finishing last is awarded to Democrat Brown, for graciously agreeing to retape “Spokane This Week,” with opponent Moyer, after he had arrived so late that one 30-minute, Brown-only segment had already been taped. When moderator Hugh Imhof left a second taping up to Brown, she canceled an appointment and stayed for another go-round.

The Oracle of Delphi Fellowship, for the worst analysis of bad news, goes to would-be state schools chief Ron Taber and his reaction to The Spokesman-Review’s late October poll showing him with 33 percent of the vote. The poll was “phony,” Taber insisted, because it gave respondents the names of the candidates who would be on the ballot before asking how they would vote. Taber was right that the poll was off, albeit slightly. He finished with 36 percent.

The Yada Yada Yada Award for the most frequently repeated phrase is a tie between “Medicare cuts,” used by Democrats who never quite explained they were talking about cuts of projected growth, and “big labor bosses” uttered by Republicans who apparently think organized labor is run by stock characters from a 1950s B movie. Which one you heard most depends on when your finger wore out while using the remote control to bypass commercials.

The Silver Slug Citation for practicing the slimeist of modern campaign tactics goes to whomever was conducting push polling in Eastern Washington’s congressional race, claiming to be conducting a survey but really trying to sway voters’ opinions. Several readers answered the newspaper’s request for information, but no one caught a traceable name or a phone number on Caller ID. Next time, we hope to be able to give this award in person, before Election Day.

A Good Conduct Medal for the nicest non-public gesture by a politician during the campaign goes to Vice President Al Gore, in a private moment backstage at the Spokane Falls Community College rally. Told that one of the people in the room was suffering from a life-threatening illness, the veep put his arm around the man, urged him not to give up and promised to pray for him.

, DataTimes MEMO: This final installment of Campaign ‘96 was compiled by Staff writer Jim Camden. It will not be seen in reruns, but instead goes on hiatus until next August, when the local races begin in Campaign ‘97.

The following fields overflowed: CREDIT = Compiled by Staff writer Jim Camden