Letters To The Editor

Thu., Dec. 4, 1997

PEOPLE IN SOCIETY

Total commitment saves marriages

It’s admirable that pastors are trying to strengthen marriage vows in Spokane, according to a Nov. 28 article. Their attempt is well-intended, but does not get at the source of the problem.

Total marriage and family commitment is the strength and goal that will save a marriage. You either have it or you don’t. Loving partners don’t live for the moment, but for a lifetime. A phrase coined in the late 1960s and early ‘70s, “be your own person,” and its fallout, has been the bane of American marriages.

Stop and think. Marriage is the bonding of two people, certainly not one or both being their own person. Until this attitude changes there is little hope in changing the 50 percent divorce rate statistics.

The apathy of our populace and the extremely lenient marriage dissolution laws only compound the breakdown of the American family. The lawyers that prey upon undecided couples certainly don’t add to the solution.

I realize that you can’t legislate morals, but these laws should be restrengthened. Some states are actually doing away with marriage dissolutions.

We need better marriage role models for our young married couples to look up to, instead of divorce after divorce in their own families. Until this happens, the trend will continue, stronger marriage vows or not. James A. Nelson Spokane

Hypocrisy offensive to gays

In response to the Nov. 27 article, “He practices what others merely preach,” I’m glad Bishop Walton Mize is working to bring people together in the Spokane community. Too bad he is so biased about which Christians he supports.

During the recent Initiative 677 campaign, Rev. Mize was the most outspoken, anti-gay opponent to civil rights in this community. His anti-gay sentiments contained repeated stereotyping and a lack of understanding about the nature of diversity. Maybe Rev. Mize should acknowledge his own part in the hate crimes which target gay people. His bias and fear might be reduced by talking with the gay community, practicing what he preaches.

Rev. Mize, the gay community is offended by your hypocrisy. K.K. Robbins Spokane

RAPE

Blame goes to perpetrator

I put it to any of you who have wives, mothers, sons, daughters or grandchildren, no matter what age: Despite the evidence or circumstances surrounding the act, would your opinion change as to who is to blame for rape if it was one of your own as the victim?

Keep the blame where it belongs, on the perpetrator, only. L.L. Parsons Medical Lake

Actions do have consequences

I can’t believe the rage of controversy over a recent Opinion column by D.F. Oliveria. The Nov. 7 editorial asserted that women should use common sense to avoid situations where a rape might occur.

Oliveria suggested that some rapes might be avoided if the women acted more wisely. He said rape is wrong. He said anyone responsible for a rape should be punished. He also said that a woman should be careful.

Anyone who actually read the editorial before writing a scathing reply would have seen that. But all this has been overlooked or misquoted in the outrage over the suggestion that sometimes a woman can prevent a rape by acting wisely.

We live in a society where people are taught that their actions have no consequences. Women believe they should be able to show off their bodies in any way they want and still not be seen as sex objects. They want the freedom to play with fire without the consequences that can follow. I can dress however I want and still be surprised when a guy doesn’t get the message of “keep your hands to yourself, Bozo.”

If you don’t want to be treated as a sex object, don’t act like one. There are rape cases involving 2-year-olds, 80-year-olds and unwilling family members. That’s not the issue. The issue is women who play with fire and wonder why they get burned.

Rape is always wrong. Rapists should always be penalized. But women should behave wisely. Cathy E. McMath Spokane

Normal men won’t cross line

Reading letters of Nov. 28 reminded me, vividly, why I didn’t write after D.F. Oliveria’s Nov. 7 editorial. The zero-visibility fog, mythical logic and gaping polarization surrounding this topic seem immutable.

To me, none of the analogous situations mentioned by either letter writers or journalists were relevant. Try this: “If she would only”: a) not nag me, b) keep the house clean; c) not flirt; d) be responsible with money - “I would not have to”: a) beat her up; b) get drunk; c) take drugs.

There are millions of households which operate as if these are rational cause-and-effect relationships. Victims earnestly defend this “logic.”

Normal men, with correctly wired brains, seem to fear that if they were placed in the same situation, they also would be capable of raping this woman, aka, the “testosterone defense.” It’s simply not true. For example, a normal man does not cross over the line of hitting his wife over excessive credit card bills.

Just because they have, on occasion, been aroused by a fantasy of dominion, does not mean they could truly inflict excruciating pain and humiliation on a hapless victim. Screams, pleas or drug-induced stupor should act as dampers to arousal, not to fan the flames of uncontrolled anger and violence, disguised as lust.

I believe in the nobility of men. They have God-given free will, absolute control over all body parts, and they should be treated - and prosecuted - as such. Lucy Forman Gurnea Chewelah, Wash.

SPOKANE MATTERS

City pay raises not needed

The citizens of Spokane should wise up after reading the Nov. 29 story about City Manager Bill Pupo wanting to raise salaries, when the city has no money for streets.

Plus, the average worker’s salary is $7 per hour. If the worker can live on this, purchase a home, pay high property and gas taxes, just why do they need these over-inflated pay raises?

I for one say it is time for all good citizens of Spokane to stand up and be counted and put a stop to these pay raises and use the money where it will benefit all the citizens.

It is funny, they keep telling us there is no money for streets in the future unless they get a gas tax increase, but Pupo is telling us there will be money forthcoming for pay raises. Flood him with letters telling him it is out of the question. Harry M. Davidson Spokane

Have nots paying for haves

What a surprise to find out in the Nov. 29 Spokesman-Review that Spokane’s top managers are expected to get raises! The people of Spokane will have to pay these already too high salaries, and many of these people are having a difficult time feeding, clothing, housing and providing all the other essentials it takes to live from just day to day.

If anything, these top-salaried people should take a cut so as to help the needy out.

Just think about it. The families who need will be giving to those who don’t need. Bobbie Cullitan Spokane

GAS TAX

Use taxes for intended purpose

Since the motor vehicle fuel tax increase was voted down, a lot has been written about Washington voters wanting roads repaired but not being willing to pay for it. The passage of the Spokane County Conservation Futures indicates the people are willing to pay if we get something in return.

The problem with the gas tax is we are already paying for, but not getting, the repairs. Washington drivers currently pay millions of dollars in user fees in the form of gasoline taxes and automobile excise fees, but a large portion of these user fees disappear, and are not used to fix our roads and bridges.

Our gas taxes are as high as most other states, and registration and license for a new car can cost 100 times what it does in other states. Before asking for more money, use on transportation what is already being collected from transportation. David H. Wordinger Medical Lake

GOVERNMENT AND POLITICS

Nethercutt not helping his chances

If Rep. George Nethercutt wins his next campaign it will not be because of the reasoning he displayed in the his letter of Nov. 30.

After telling the readers that he wanted the authority over the Tri-Cities area to be local, he gives as an explanation his belief that federal agencies would not provide adequate funding of the project.

He is a member of the House Interior Appropriations subcommittee. Does he really think that the local governments could do a better job? Perhaps he is unaware of the recent disclosure that it will take huge sums of federal money to prevent seepage from the Hanford toxic waste holding tanks from poisoning the waters of the Columbia within the next seven years. Why isn’t he trying harder to secure adequate funds from the federal treasury?

My own feeling is that his attempt to explain his position does nothing to help his re-election chances. Fred J. Meyer Coulee Dam, Wash.

WELFARE

Don’t punish all for abuse by some

I have been following the “saga” of welfare stories and response letters to the editor with great interest. Most recently I have been listening to the words of L. Jim Shamp (“Real poverty is fought and won by individuals,” Letters, Nov. 2, and “Damage of system, abusers plain to see,” Nov. 24).

Shamp appears to be a watchdog for the taxpayers’ money. As a landlord to all those welfare abusers, I am curious to know if after accepting their welfare rent money, Shamp did his responsible citizen duty and turned them in to the State Fraud Division.

Let’s face it, there is fraud at every level and every sector of our society. For instance, taxes - we all know that there are those among us who use every loophole known to man and who downright cheat to keep from paying a penny. And yet we do not abolish our entire tax refund system or say that all taxpayers are sleazy and greedy based on a few abusers.

To me it appears welfare should be handled in a similar manner. We should not take away a basic safety net to needy families who are struggling based upon a few abusers who are the focus of Shamp’s writings. Debra C. Mercer Spokane

IN THE PAPER

Lack of professionalism appalling

It is my understanding that a hallmark of good journalism includes the quality of objectivity and an effort to report the whole story. “Teens hold wake for friends” (Nov. 8) is disgracefully lacking in both of these qualities.

Robin Rivers apparently spent quite a bit of time talking with the teens on the street and attending their Friday night wake. A major piece was missing from this article, however. What about Alicia Easterwood’s family? A memorial service was conducted by her family also on Friday at the Fairmount Cemetery. Where was Rivers?

If she had made the effort to come to this ceremony she would have seen that this child was deeply loved. Family pictures of Alica with her sisters and in an assorted number of activities covered the walls of the room. Her young sister talked of her love for Alicia and how much she would miss her. Does this sound like a child “who was forced out of her house” as this article so incorrectly states? It was cited in the paper that “a lot had gone wrong in Alicia’s life.” While this is true, a lot had gone right with her as well, especially within the last nine years which were spent with her adoptive family.

I am appalled at Rivers’ lack of professionalism and gross insensitivity.

A year of intense worry for their child finally culminated in her traumatic death. The deep sorrow which this family is experiencing is made even worse by your reckless reporting. A front-page apology is in order. Patrice E. Griffin-Codd Spokane