Many Nba Players Fail To Earn Their Keep

At last, shocking and definitive proof that Toronto Raptor Walt Williams is the most valuable player in the NBA.

If you don’t agree, blame it on Seattle SuperSonics coach George Karl - he assigned this story.

Karl has made it known at various times that he tends to agree with the late Spiro Agnew in one area: the notion that we in the media are less sworn seekers of truth than nattering nabobs of negativity.

So, he offered to us a list of stories he felt would be interesting to himself and the public - rather than our customary tripe.

One suggestion was to figure out a way to determine players’ value, some measure of production to be viewed against their salary.

So, by George, here’s a formula I came up with: Add a player’s total points, rebounds, assists, blocks and steals, and then subtract turnovers.

That should provide some rough measure of how much work they accomplish on the court. Since there is no name for these units of production, I decided to call them “havliceks.”

Of many favorite players in the past, the one who stands out in my memory as getting the most done - in all phases of the game - during his time on the floor was Boston Celtic John Havlicek.

I considered calling them unselds or ervings, but havliceks sounded more scientific, don’t you think? OK, once you get your total havliceks, you divide them into each player’s salary to arrive at a dollar-per-havlicek figure.

A couple of notes on my scientific technique: I used total points, rebounds, etc., rather than average because I felt that rewarded durability. (Everybody knows you can’t accrue havliceks sitting on the bench or lying in the training room).

And, except for a few players of particular interest, and SuperSonics, I did not factor in those who averaged less than 10 points a game, who had played in fewer than 30 games, or who have seen fewer than 1,000 minutes of action.

If you’re not valuable enough to your team to play that much, we don’t need to bother with you.

Granted, this is a flawed system. Salaries are for this year only, and do not include balloon payments or other inducements that could inflate average earnings this year. Also, no measurements are attainable on intangible contributions or appeal in drawing fans into the arenas.

The most amazing revelation of this extended research was the fact that an awful lot of guys are getting paid many thousands of dollars every time they do anything on the court.

Only two players in the league, considering stats through the end of last week, had built up more than 2,000 havliceks: Michael Jordan (2,216) and Karl Malone (2,129), but, as you’ll discover, only one of those players is a real bargain.

Most valuable players

And the emphasis here is on the word “value.”

Williams, a fourth-year forward for Toronto, costs an amazingly low $188.78 per havlicek. Collecting minimum wage, Williams averages 17.5 points per game and has racked up 1,311 havliceks.

Dominique Wilkins. What? There must be some mistake. Au contraire. Wilkins is collecting minimum wage for the Spurs this season and is pumping in 18.8 points per game, with a total of 1,157 havliceks. That’s a bargain-basement $213.91 per havlicek.

David Wesley, guard for the Celtics, averages 16.3 points a game and is versatile enough to have 1,255 havliceks for a $350,000 pittance.

Gerald Wilkins, forward for the Orlando Magic, comes in at a cheap $317.30 per havlicek, averaging 11 points a game for the minimum wage of $247,500. Heck, make it a family package and you could get both Wilkins brothers for slightly more than $500 per havlicek.

Miami guard Voshon Lenard, another minimum-wager, scores 11.5 a game ($335.82 per havlicek).

Best buys

These are the guys who are reasonably priced, and can really play. Scottie Pippen. The Chicago Bulls all-star makes a mere $2.2 million for great scoring, rebounding and defense. His price is only $1,308 per havlicek.

Terrell Brandon, Cleveland guard, scores 19.9 a game and has more than 300 assists for $1.3 million. That’s a cool $822 per havlicek. Damon Stoudamire of Toronto isn’t the bargain teammate Williams is, but he still comes in at $966 per havlicek for leading his team in scoring and assists.

Karl Malone, although he receives $4.65 million, is still a bargain at only $2,129 per, as is Sacramento’s Mitch Richmond at $2,000 per hav. Lakers guards Eddie Jones and Nick Van Exel each make less than $2 million a season, and both cost less than $1,500 per hav.

And Michael Jordan. He’s paid $30 million this season, which is a whopping $13,601 per havlicek. Now, is he worth 10 Pippens or six Malones?

Stinkers

I dipped below the 10 ppg average and minutes-played limit to see how outrageously priced some NBA players are.

Golden State’s Donyell Marshall pulls down $3.36 million to average 4.3 points a game, coming in at $10,838 per havlicek. Orlando’s Horace Grant is fairly productive (1,105 havliceks), but he’s paid $14.8 million, coming in at a pricey $13,445 per hav.

The champ, however, is Sacramento’s Bobby Hurley, who has only 126 havs for his $3 million salary - an astounding $24,349 per unit of production.

Sonics

Got some surprises for you.

While Gary Payton leads the team in scoring and assists, he’s pulling down $10.2 million this year, giving him a havlicek value of $5,654.

New center Jim McIlvaine ($5,535 per hav) whose value has been questioned by many, is actually a better deal than Payton. Sure, he has only 542 havs to Payton’s 1,802, but he is paid only a third of Payton’s salary.

Detlef Schrempf is a cheap All-Star at $2,350 per hav, coming in lower than Sam Perkins ($3,046) and Hersey Hawkins ($2,530).

Craig Ehlo has also drawn some questions regarding his production, but he makes only $360K for a very respectable $1,168 per havlicek.

The “Reignman,” Shawn Kemp, has a valid argument that he’s underpaid. Disregarding the balloon payment on his contract, he’s one of the few of the league’s true elite players to come in at under $2,000 per havlicek ($1,983). But the real bargain on the Sonics is guard Eric Snow, who makes the minimum of $247,500. His cost per unit of production is only $727.94.

And he’s worth every last havlicek.