Keep Those Nic, UI Kids Separated

State Sen. Gordon Crow survived his encounter with North Idaho College chauvinists with his humor intact. Before Christmas, the Hayden Republican had the gall to suggest it might be good if NIC and the University of Idaho merged. Well, NIC officials, teachers and students went nuts. A trustee even suggested that ol’ Gordo wasn’t fit to represent us. That was then. Last week, Crow reappeared on campus to release his committee’s report on North Idaho day care problems. Quipped he: “I’m not here to suggest we merge NIC’s day care with the University of Idaho’s day care.”

Making his point

A Kootenai County bailiff asked an older man Thursday morning if he had car keys on him after he’d set off a courthouse metal detector. “No, I left the keys in the car,” responded the senior citizen. “But I’ve got this big old knife.” … Why doesn’t Spokane have a pro football team? asks proprietor Tim Nelson of Mocha Motion, a coffee hut on West Hayden. Because (drum roll, please) Seattle would want one, too. Badabump. Onward. … After reading my editorial Friday eulogizing the late Sonny Bono, Marge Winderman couldn’t resist asking: So, you don’t mind working pro bono? Actually, I do. That’s why they feed me peanuts around here. … Shhh. I’m checking out the rumor that Bonner County employees are collecting money to buy Commissioner Bud Mueller a season ski pass at Schweitzer.

List of five

A local figure who shall remain anonymous e-mailed these “Top 5 Reasons for a Happy New Year in North Idaho for 1998”: 5. Our mild winter will allow for the early use of permanent greens. 4. The battle for the vacated U.S. House seat in the Second District will render politics here, by comparison, a spectator sport. 3. Commissioner Ron Rankin will run for re-election on the platform that he voted to increase the Kootenai County budget. 2. The tens of thousands of people who daily hang out at McEuen Field will demonstrate to the “revitalizers” that no changes are necessary - ever! And 1. “I didn’t make D.F. Oliveria’s Top 10 Huckleberries for 1997!” (Hmmm. Stay tuned.)

Huckleberries

A Bonner County subscriber spotted this bumpersnicker at the Northtown Mall: “Cyberspace frightened me so badly that I downloaded in my pants.” … Lakes Middle School instructor Dave Ballard admits he had a crush on “The Patty Duke Show” cousins, too (Huckleberries, Dec. 22). And adds, CdA’s Ms. Duke and the old cast are planning a reunion show this spring. That, and he also was smitten by Leslie Gore and Shelley Fabares. Yep, Dave definitely hit puberty during my g-g-generation. … FYI: Look for Kootenai County Sheriff’s Capt. Ben Wolfinger to challenge state Rep. Jeff Alltus, R-Hayden, in the Republican primary. … Chuck and Becky Leighton couldn’t get the editors to print the names listed as “brothers and sisters” for newborn son, Anthony: pets Bear, Kodiak, Nanook, Grizzly and Polar. But Huckleberries standards aren’t as high. I’m told little Anthony is the pick of the litter. … A Farmin Stidwell Elementary student said to new Bonner County Superintendent Roy Rummler as they passed in the hall: “You look like a president!” Wondered Rummler later, “Was that a compliment or criticism?” Hey, it’s not every day you see a superintendent in a Bonner County school.

Parting shot

Now that Khris Bershers is flacking for the National League of Cities, I reminded her she said last year: “You’d have to have a hole in your head to want to live in Washington, D.C., when you could live in Idaho.” She’d just returned home after serving as Congressman Helen Chenoweth’s aide. So what happened? E-mails Khris: “D.C. had more to offer. Seems that people and organizations in the D.C. area here need more help dealing with the vermin of the press corps (and are willing to pay more for that help).” Hmmm. Khris never called us “vermin” when she was handing out Helen’s press releases. , DataTimes MEMO: Gotta Huck? Call the Huckleberry Hound Hotline: (800) 344-6718 or (208) 765-7125; daveo@spokesman.com.

The following fields overflowed: CREDIT = D.F. Oliveria The Spokesman-Review