Their Kindness Restored Me

Wed., Nov. 10, 1999

Joan Groom Special To Opinion

About six weeks ago, my children and I found ourselves without a home due to a domestic violence situation. I had no idea what to do. I was scared. I felt stranded, betrayed and like I wasn’t worth anything.

My children range in age from 11 years old to 21 months old and the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do is watch them pack their stuff into boxes, and tell them I had no idea where we were going to live.

I wanted my family to stay in the St. John area, because my children and I have felt accepted here. The people in this town are generous and we love the school. In the middle of this one day, my oldest son Zackery was invited to a birthday party for the son of a woman I didn’t know very well. This woman called to confirm the birthday party plans and when she asked me what I was doing, I said, `I’m packing my stuff. I might have to move my kids to a shelter if we can’t find a house.”

She was totally shocked. She said she felt sad for me, a single mom with five kids, looking for a place to live. Two days later, she called and said, “My husband and I have a house on our farm. It has a bunch of furniture in it and if you want to come take a look at it, come out.”

First, I cried for 15 minutes. I then went out and looked at the house, and agreed to take it. It was perfect. The house has four bedrooms and a huge living room with picture windows, and there are horses out in the pasture.

I was surprised anyone would take a chance on me. I’m not sure if I would have that much trust in a single mom with five kids. It would have been easy to say no, because of the worry that the house would be torn apart or the kids would be unruly. People don’t put a lot of faith in you when you have two failed relationships and five kids. But this has allowed me to live in a place that is comfortable and safe, and to stay in the community I love.

I don’t know how to thank them, except to keep the house in good order and do the best I can raising my kids. My kids are my everything.

I urge others to take risks on women like me, because this has helped me not feel like a piece of trash. I felt disposable before; now I don’t. If you give someone a chance, they will prove themselves. And I am now proving to myself, my children and the couple who helped us that I am worth something.

Joan Groom, 33, is a resident of St. John, Wash.

Local journalism is essential.

Give directly to The Spokesman-Review's Northwest Passages community forums series -- which helps to offset the costs of several reporter and editor positions at the newspaper -- by using the easy options below. Gifts processed in this system are tax deductible.

Meet Our Journalists

Jesse Tinsley

Meet Jesse Tinsley. As a certified drone pilot, this veteran Spokesman-Review photographer often can be seen capturing beautiful aerial photographs of our region. Sometimes though, the job requires getting down with the dogs.
Jim Meehan

Jim Meehan is no stranger to Zag Nation. As the lead writer covering the Gonzaga men’s basketball team, he tells the stories behind the game and gets fans a bit closer to their favorite players.
Molly Quinn

There is no artist in Spokane like Molly Quinn. Her whimsical style is instantly recognizable to readers of The Spokesman-Review. She has painted gorgeous illustrations that instantly elevate the journalism accompanying it. She brings to life the stories that defy photography. She makes our pages better.
Rob Curley

Spokesman-Review editor Rob Curley loves to talk with people and learn about their lives, whether it's a best-selling author or a stranger he meets downtown on his walk to lunch. It's that inquisitive nature combined with a playful sense of storytelling that helps make our newspaper different than most.