So many questions; so few answers

I spent the Thanksgiving holiday with newspaper in one hand and television remote in the other as I waded through the montage of politics and life on the home front, seeking answers to some complex questions.

Four days later and despite dogged determination, I remained clueless. Instead of answers, more questions surfaced. Questions like:

Extraterrestrial: Does Santa exist? I’m a die-hard Santa believer, but after the Black Friday melees, one wonders if the jolly guy is still around.

Spokane Valley: Spokane Valley’s third annual Celebration of Lights is, once again, in the U-City parking lot, where one lone pine tree stands amid concrete. Let’s see, a parking lot or Mirabeau Park with the Spokane River, CenterPlace, spacious grounds and plenty of pine trees. Am I missing something?

Spokane: Rebecca Schlering, once down and out in Spokane, has taken the store by the cash register and risen to business owner. Why do some persevere in spite of the odds while others throw in the towel when adversity comes a’ knocking?

Idaho: The movie “Wolf People” is set to be filmed in the Panhandle neck of the Wild West. Why does Idaho get the good stuff, like Red Lobster, Jamba Juice, holiday parades and anti-terrorist tactical training centers? And speaking of Idaho…

Atmospheric: Who ordered the snow?

National: Someone tell me again, in plain English, why are we in Iraq? Where’s bin Laden? Oh, and where’s the rage?

Movies: Why have the warmhearted dysfunctional holiday movies like “Uncle Buck,” “Planes, Trains and Automobiles,” “Christmas Vacation,” and “Scrooged” been hijacked by “Bad Santa” and “Really Bad Santa” or “The Ice Harvest”? (Another stumper for the question guru.)

Theater: Why is “The Lion King” so darn good? Even from my limited-view seat, I was mesmerized.

Religion and Politics: Will the rhetorical circle ever end? With every argument for, there’s an argument against. Humans have the inherent trait of latching onto disagreements like barnacles to a boat. Get peace? Better to get milk; it’s attainable.

Katrina Help: Did you know more than 70 countries offered assistance to the United States after Hurricane Katrina? Cuba, Venezuela, France, Russia, Canada, Mexico, Germany, and the People’s Republic of China, to name a few. You didn’t hear about this? Neither did I.

Kids: How do 2-year-olds spot a “Gamma” figure with no prompting and particularly when this “Gamma” was among several other women? (By the way, I was thrilled!)

Spokane Valley: How do the defeated summon the wherewithal to thank their supporters? Sally Jackson, a Spokane Valley disincorporation proponent, recently did just that in a letter thanking those who helped and stating she admired their dedication. Jackson, if one day a council position calls, you’ve got my vote.

Speaking of voting… .

Federal government: The handwringers pace over voting apathy. Someone tell me again, in plain English, why they’re pacing? During the last two presidential elections, voters discovered the truth about voting: Tthe results can change depending on who’s doing the counting and how hard they’re looking.

Well, I’ll be – there’s an answer to my question about apathy!