Vehicle theft victim needs a superhero

Rosie Buck would never ask, but she needs a hero to pimp her ride.

I’m not talking about one of those radical auto makeovers as seen on TV. The spunky 90-year-old Spokane woman just needs someone to repair the worst damage caused by a thieving pack of underage rats.

What they did to Rosie should make every law-abiding citizen steam like an overheated radiator.

Trouble began on a May Saturday outside the North Side apartment where Rosie lives alone. Rosie popped the hood of her brown wagon and set about changing the oil filter.

You heard me. Rosie grew up on a farm north of Davenport, driving tractors and doing what was then considered “man’s work.” This independent soul isn’t about to let old age keep her from getting grease under her nails.

Rosie says doing her own maintenance has kept the Ford Fairmont station wagon she bought new in 1979 running like a 21-jeweled watch despite its 195,000-plus miles.

Bent over the engine Rosie sensed a presence. She turned to see a teenage girl who began asking inane questions: What are you doing? Do you want to sell your car?

It was a scam. With Rosie distracted, a male accomplice reached into the open driver’s window. He snatched Rosie’s purse from the front seat and ran from the carport with the woman’s keys, credit cards and cash. The girl made a similar vanishing act.

This was only the beginning of one mixed-up afternoon.

It took a firefighter climbing through her bedroom window to get Rosie back into her locked apartment.

A little later, a father and his young daughter arrived with Rosie’s purse. The girl found it discarded in a vacant lot. The credit cards, keys and cash were gone, but Rosie’s bus pass gave the finders her address.

This part of the drama had barely ended when Rosie stepped outside to a shocking discovery. The punks had used her stolen keys – to steal her car.

“Can you believe it?” she asks. “That’s pretty darned rude.”

Once the police had all the facts, Rosie tried to relax. But she couldn’t help but worry that the criminals would return and use her keys to get in. “I didn’t want to go to bed,” she says, pointing to the living room chair where she spent a nervous, white-knuckle night.

It’s impossible not to fall in love with this animated, plain-spoken senior who proudly offers the following statistics: two kids, five grandkids and 11 great-grandkids. Her son, John, started the track program at Spokane Community College and turned it into a national power. The beloved coach passed away this year from cancer.

Rosie showed me her beautiful hand-made quilts and pillows. She told me stories from her long life.

Her memory is scalpel sharp. She even remembers the name of the Spokane car dealer who sold her the wagon. Rosie paid cash. “When I buy something I want to pay for it and it’s mine,” she says.

The joyride ended the next afternoon in a traffic stop on North Division. The thieves had not been kind to Rosie’s pride and joy. The police took Rosie to the scene.

“I looked at my car and thought, ‘Oh, my god.’ “

The front bumper is battered. One of the wheel wells is smashed dangerously close to the tire. The rear latch is broken. One side is scraped and dinged.

The wagon was covered in grime inside and out. The interior smelled like an ashtray. Rosie spent hours scrubbing it clean.

And now comes this thing called justice.

The idiot caught behind the wheel pleaded guilty in juvenile court the other day. The runaway from a group youth home has been ordered to pay Rosie’s $2,900 repair estimate as part of his sentence.

He told Rosie he was real sorry.

Three others will have their day in court soon. I’m betting they will act very sorry, too.

I probably don’t have to say this. But the frozen head of Walt Disney will be thawed out and reattached before Rosie gets paid what she’s due. Restitution for crime victims is often more hollow than a politician’s character.

That’s why Rosie needs a hero – not that she’d ever ask.

“I’ve been on my own and paddled my own canoe and never took a dime from nobody,” she says. “I never think about my age. If I have a problem I take care of myself.”