Primary questions? We’ve got answers

The primary ballots are being put in the mail starting Wednesday, which means the complaining will start Thursday.

Whaddya mean I have to pick a Republican or a Democratic ballot? Who came up with this system? How can they violate my constitutional rights to vote for whomever I please?

Memories are still fresh from the halcyon days of elections – before 2004 – when primaries in Washington were pretty much like general elections, only with more candidates. Punch the card or fill in the circle for a Republican for the Senate, a Democrat for the House, a Libertarian for county commissioner and an independent for sheriff, and everyone was fine with it.

Everyone except the major political parties. They successfully challenged the 70-year-old blanket primary law as violating their rights of freedom of association. That is, if a candidate is going to be their party’s nominee, he or she should be selected by members of their party.

Don’t even start on how silly you think that is. The federal courts agree with the parties, and it’s pretty well a dead issue.

And face it, voters in almost every other state in the Union have been voting a party ballot in their primaries since, well, forever. So here are answers to other frequently asked primary questions:

Will anyone know which party ballot I choose? No. The ballots aren’t color-coded, and they’re in envelopes when the identification is checked, then separated and put in a stack.

Yeah, but couldn’t some elections worker recognize my name, look at the ballot, remember I voted Republican, and tell the Democrats? Only if they had a REALLY good memory for names while they open thousands of envelopes, and a bad memory for the training that told them it’s a gross misdemeanor punishable by a year in jail and a $5,000 fine. The parties will never find out how you vote, unless you tell them. (You could lie about it, too, and they couldn’t prove you wrong.)

Suppose that I, just for the heck of it, mark the Republican ballot for some races and the Democratic ballot for other races – so that I’m not, like, voting for a Republican AND a Democrat for county commissioner – then mail ‘em both in? Boy, you really can’t let the blanket primary go, can you? Neither ballot will count for any partisan race. If you marked the nonpartisan races the same way, those candidates will get one vote; if you marked different candidates there, they won’t.

So I don’t have to mark a partisan ballot for the partisan races and the nonpartisan ballot for the nonpartisan races? No. You only use the nonpartisan ballot if you don’t want to vote in the partisan races. Keep repeating: One ballot, only one.

Do I get to vote for two candidates in each judicial primary, so that two go to the general? No. Repeat: One candidate, only one.

If I vote in a partisan ballot in the primary, do I get a ballot with only that party’s candidates in the general? No, in the general you can go back to the time-honored Washington tradition of splitting your ticket, voting for whichever Democrat, Republican, Green, Libertarian, Socialist or independent in any race.

And what if I don’t want to validate this travesty that was perpetrated on Washington”s time-honored blanket primary? You could be like two-thirds of the state’s voters and not vote, then complain about the choices you have on the general election ballot.

Catch the candidates

Today: Sen. Maria Cantwell, in a discussion of affordable health care. 12:45 p.m., The Onion, 302 W. Riverside.

Democratic candidates for county commissioner and auditor at a 4th District fundraiser. 3 p.m., Jackson residence, 11722 E. 6th, Spokane Valley.

Monday: Spokane County sheriff candidates at a special meeting for Medical Lake SCOPE. 7 p.m., second floor, Medical Lake City Hall, 124 S. Lefevre.

Tuesday: Democratic congressional candidate Peter Goldmark at a “critical issues forum.” 7 p.m., West Central Community Center, 1603 N. Belt.

Wednesday: Goldmark, at a rally and town hall meeting in Pullman. 2 p.m. rally in Rainey Park; 7 p.m. meeting at Neill Library.

Sunday: Republican sheriff candidates, on KAYU. 6:30 p.m., Channel 28.