Dear Diane: Daughter pressures parents for cell phone

Dear Diane: My daughter, “Bess,” is 12 years old and in the sixth grade at a private school. Ever since school started this year, she has been pestering her father and I for her own cell phone.

Bess claims that all the kids in her school have their own cells, and she feels like “a poor kid.” I personally think she is too young to have her own phone. I mean, I was 16 before my parents allowed me to have a telephone in my room (this was back in the day when portable phones were only for the rich).

Also, her father and I are worried that she’ll ring up outrageous bills because she’ll be texting and phoning her friends at all hours.

Bess has really been turning up the charm on her father, who dotes on her a little too much, and I think he’s about to crack.

So here’s the question: How do I convince Bess she is too young for her own phone, while making sure her father doesn’t cave in to her cajoling? — Mom in Manchester

Dear Manchester: I can’t help you with your husband. You know him far better than I do, and frankly, I have a feeling Bess knows exactly what buttons to push to get Daddy around her pinky — especially the “I’m made to feel like a poor kid” line. There’s nothing a father hates to hear from his daughter more than anything remotely suggesting he isn’t man enough to properly care for his princess.

My advice is to bite the bullet and get Bess a phone. Check for a plan that you are willing to pay and that will limit the amount of text messages she can send. I have spoken to several parents who like the fact that they can keep contact with their children when they’re away from home.