Dear Diane: Hubby’s hooked online

Wed., March 14, 2007

Diane Verhoeven King Features Syndicate

Dear Diane: My husband of 17 years, “Ralph,” is addicted to his computer. Specifically, he is addicted to an online game. In this game, he plays a fantasy character – a dwarf. He and his online “guild” buddies spend hours and hours pretending to go on quests and battling other guilds.

Ralph spends up to six hours a night online playing this game. He is neglecting our two children. He is neglecting his household duties. And most of all, he is neglecting ME.

Since he began playing this game four months ago, Ralph and I have not been intimate. By the time he trudges to bed, he’s too pooped to play – with me.

I don’t want to force Ralph to give up his fantasy life with his friends. I just want to him to resume his fantasy life with me. Any suggestions? I am at the end of my tether.

– Desperate Housewife in Houston

Dear Desperate: With respect to your feelings, your situation is not as dire as you may think it is. The fact that you don’t want to force Ralph to give up his hobby and are not the type of person to issue an ultimatum is a healthy attitude to have.

Calmly and rationally explain to Ralph that you have been feeling neglected and would like it if the two of you could schedule regular “date nights” where he can give his computer a rest and spend some time with you. You might also try going to a costume shop and buying a sexy fantasy costume with which to lure Ralph away from the computer.

If all that fails, your last resort may be to go to a marriage counselor.

Good luck.

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