Dear Diane: Professional needs advice

Dear Diane: I am a 34-year-old professional female. I have quite a few friends that I still keep in touch with from high school. Many of them have since gotten married and have a few kids. I couldn’t be happier for them.

One friend, “Janet,” just had her third baby last year. I love her kids, and they love me too. They truly are the cutest. The only problem: Every time I visit Janet, she tells me, “I just can’t believe you don’t want kids! How can you say you don’t want one of these?”

It’s not an isolated incident — it’s every time I see her. It’s getting to where I avoid her. It’s as if she takes the fact that I don’t want to have children as an affront to her lifestyle and her choices, and one time she implied that I must hate children. Nothing could be further from the truth. I LOVE them — as long as they are someone else’s!

How can I handle her when she gets on her “childbearing is the greatest joy on Earth” soapbox? She’s great in every other way. — Katie in Orlando

Dear Katie:

I have a feeling Janet is a little bit jealous of you. You still have your freedom, more career options, a chance at more prosperous life — and she’s stuck at home with her children.

I’m not saying Janet resents being a mother, but every time she sees you, she is reminded of what she gave up to experience “the greatest joy on Earth.”

Perhaps a Girls Night Out with some of the old gang might help. See if you can round up a few of your old girlfriends and take Janet out. Maybe she just needs to “feel single” once in a while to keep her from harping at you.