Harriette Cole: Lonely transplant mulls another move

Dear Harriette: I’ve been living in a new city for several years and I haven’t made many friends. I came here for work, but it’s not enough. I often feel lonely and sad. I am a friendly person, but I can’t seem to make friends. I’m beginning to feel there’s something wrong with me. I haven’t met anybody who could be a potential date. It’s really tough. I’m beginning to feel hopeless and wonder if I should move again. My job is going well, so I’m not sure, and I don’t want to be seen as a failure to my family, either. Help! — Brittany, Detroit, Mich.

Dear Brittany: Before you give up and decide to move, get a city guide to see what activities you haven’t tried yet that may interest you and put you in the company of like-minded people. Include charity functions in your search. People are often successful in meeting friends and partners in such environments.

Stop worrying about what your family thinks. Chances are they will support your decision. No matter what, you have to do what’s wise for your overall well-being. If you ultimately assess this is not the city for you, research other more compelling places that have jobs in your field of focus and set your sights on moving.

You may also want to talk to a mental-health professional who can support you through this blue period.