Junk drawer tidy-up begets new task

It all started with the junk drawer.

You know, the one everyone has in the kitchen. The drawer into which we cram stuff we need, or might someday need, but don’t know where to put. I was looking for a pizza coupon, and the drawer was so crammed with … well, junk, I couldn’t get it open. I yanked hard with both hands and KAPOW! Coupons, recipe cards and batteries of every shape and size spilled onto the floor.

I sighed and looked at the clutter at my feet. “Might as well clean it out,” I muttered. An hour quickly passed as I sorted through the mess. I puzzled over a recipe for braised carrots with goat cheese I’d snipped from a magazine. I don’t think I’ve ever purchased goat cheese, intentionally. How did this recipe end up here? Further digging revealed a stack of expired Pampers coupons affixed to the bottom of the drawer with melted candle wax. Since my youngest child is 8, it’s obviously been a while since I’ve glimpsed the bottom of this drawer. I mulled that mystery as I scraped at the wax with a butter knife.

By the time the pizza arrived, several tidy stacks of papers surrounded me and the junk drawer slid open and shut with ease. I felt satisfied with my afternoon’s work, but then I noticed a cupboard door hanging ajar. It’s the door to the cabinet that houses all of the mixing bowls, storage containers and miscellaneous plastic flotsam.

The kids took their dinner to the backyard picnic table while I tackled the cupboard. While rooting through a basket of lids I found a small plastic lid with a heart embellished on it. What on earth? Then I found one with a flower shape. “Oh my gosh!” I exclaimed. “My Jell-O mold!”

“Moldy Jell-O? Let me see!” said my 13-year-old, as he wandered by.

In the dark recesses of the cupboard I unearthed the fluted container meant to mold Jell-O into an attractive shape. “See,” I explained. “You put the Jell-O in here and when it sets, you flip the container upside down and ta-da! A lovely Jell-O salad.”He raised one eyebrow. “What’s a Jell-O salad?”

He had me there. I mean, anything you put mini-marshmallows in can’t be a salad. I remembered my mom serving a lime Jell-O concoction with iceberg lettuce. Whose bright idea was it to mix gelatin and vegetables and call it salad?

Memories of church potlucks-past assailed me. Orange Jell-O with carrots, pineapple and marshmallows, blended with Miracle Whip. Lemon gelatin mixed with mashed avocados, whipped cream and mayonnaise. And when I was newly married, strawberry Jell-O layered with Cool Whip, atop a bed of crushed, buttered pretzels made an appearance at every social event. What were we thinking?

I tossed the Jell-O mold and its accessories into a burgeoning bag of items to be donated to charity. I quickly exhumed another treasure to toss. Remember Bundt cakes? One of the first cakes I ever baked was a chocolate Bundt cake with the sweet coconut center. There are actually Web sites devoted to the art of Bundt baking but alas, my Bundt days are long passed. My boys would cut a puny cake like that in fourths and then ask for more. Nowadays, I only bake sheet cakes or cupcakes that serve 24 or more. Teenagers like cake. A lot.

I wiped out the cabinet and restocked the shelves. The door still didn’t close properly. By this time my husband, Derek, had arrived. He surveyed the situation. “We need new cabinets,” he opined. “Let’s go shopping.” That darn tax rebate check was calling out to him. “You need a new project …” it whispered.” A bigggg project …”

Did you know Home Depot is open until 10 p.m. on weeknights? Me neither. Wearily I followed my husband up one aisle and down another. Maple, pine or oak? Varnished, stained or unfinished? “Let’s see, we’ll need to move the dishwasher under the window,” he said. “We’d better head over to plumbing supplies.” My heart sank. Evidently, replacing existing cupboards with new ones was not enough of a challenge for my handy man. Derek’s eyes sparkled as he talked about tearing out walls and replacing wallboard. But I knew from past experience that midway through the project his eyes would lose their sheen.

In a desperate bid to distract him I said, “You know honey, we’ve lived in our house for 15 years and never painted the kitchen. Couldn’t we just start with paint?”

He quickly dispatched me to the paint area. Evening Shadow or Mountain Air? Classic Sand or Granite Peak? Whatever happened to colors? You know, blue, green or yellow?

Dazed by the dizzying array of palettes I grabbed a couple of paint color cards. It was late. I was tired. I couldn’t remember how I’d ended up at Home Depot at 9:45 p.m. I figured it out as soon as we got home and I looked for a place to stash the paint cards and kitchen remodel pamphlets. Warily, I eyed the cause of my daylong odyssey. Cleaning out your junk drawer can end up being an expensive task. If you get the urge to tidy up your drawer – count the cost. I wish I had.