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The Spokesman-Review Newspaper
Spokane, Washington  Est. May 19, 1883

In finding their way, they found each other

Tammi Norris and Aaron Mikelonis excited about upcoming wedding

Tammi Norris and Aaron Mikelonis plan to wed Dec. 12.  (Courtesy photo)
Renee Sande Kiss the Bride NW Correspondent
Tammi Norris and Aaron Mikelonis both knew their lives were about to change. Then they met and they realized just how much. Introduced in 2009 at a birthday party for a mutual friend of their then-12 year-old boys, the two women would soon discover they had much more in common. Both California transplants, Norris and Mikelonis had each been married for 17 years, had a younger child as well, and were both going through some changes in their marriage that left them questioning where their individual paths were leading. When their paths crossed, they found the answer. “Going through this common time in our life, we found support in each other and established a really solid friendship; soon we realized just where it would take us if we let it,” said Norris. Things were confirmed even more when the two women each started having common visions of the Hindu deities Shiva and Shakti, who are believed in Hinduism to be the two halves of each of our spirits as a whole. While this spiritual experience was completely new to Norris, who had grown up Catholic, Mikelonis had some previous experience with Eastern religion. Interestingly, in 2004, during a tantric initiation with the Dalai Lama, Mikelonis had a transcendental experience which impressed upon her the notion of a life-altering change within five years. Five years later, she met Norris. “Coming together, we formed a spirituality circle,” said Mikelonis. “To be together was just a natural extension of our relationship,” said Norris. Both women ended their marriages. Although it wasn’t an easy time, they are thankful to their families for the poise with which they accepted the changes. “I’m very proud of how Aaron and I and our kids and their dads have all moved into this very gracefully,” said Norris. “Our teenage sons especially, by moving into their discomfort, have really become much more interested in politics and religion and humanity and have realized that perhaps they really don’t know themselves like they thought…it’s really seemed to open up their way of thinking.” The recent change in Washington State law to allow same-sex marriage, understandably deeply affected the two women. However, Mikelonis was not prepared for just how it would affect her. “I was really struck by how moved—how hurt, really—that it was up for a vote.” “Even though we were going to commit to each other, no matter what, it was a relief,” added Norris. On the third anniversary of their commitment to each other, December 12, Norris and Mikelonis will be married in a small ceremony at a friend’s home, with 20 of their family members and closest friends looking on. “It’ll be a non-traditional wedding with a few familiar elements,” said Norris. “Fun is the theme with lots of movement and mingling.” “We didn’t want a sit-down dinner, rather we really liked the Costco sample idea,” added Mikelonis with a laugh. “So there will be a Smores bar, hot chocolate bar, tartlet bar…” During the ceremony, Norris and Mikelonis will take part in a hand-fasting or binding ceremony, which, following Celtic tradition, is when the couple’s hands are bound together using ribbons of 13 different colors, each one a celebration of a promise made to each other. To further acknowledge this life-changing moment for everyone involved, upon their union, Norris and Mikelonis will become Mrs. and Mrs. Etal, which is Latin for “and others.” “It refers to all of the many other people our relationship brings together,” said Norris.