Dear Kiantha: It’s OK to splurge, but only after needs are met

Dear Kiantha,

I have three children and basically live in working poverty, but the one time of year that I do have extra money is now during income tax return season. I usually get somewhere between $5,000 and $7,000. Every year, I am usually right at the point where my car needs work or I need to buy a new-to-me used car with a million miles on it.

I am frustrated and want to do something special for my kids. Every time my kids see commercials for Disneyland, they get so excited, and I feel horrible that I can’t afford to do things like that with them. Is it irresponsible to use my tax return on something like this?

Dear Friend,

Let me start by saying that I know that feeling, the feeling of wanting to do more than my resources would allow for my young son. When he was a small child, I was working and living in poverty at the same time. My son was obsessed with Legos, and I wanted nothing more than to take him to Lego Land, but the truth was I couldn’t afford to do so and as a mother it made me feel horrible.

In all honesty, I am not sure that my son wanted it as bad as I wanted it for him. He was maybe 3 or 4 years old, so while he was totally fascinated by the advertisements, his attention was quickly on to something else the moment something else shiny caught his eye.

Income tax time is a time when many people get that extra bit of money back based on the total amount of income taxes they paid during the year. Often when you have done without, it seems like the right time to splurge on the things you can’t normally do for your children or yourself.

Although the urge to spend those extra pennies on something fun may be strong, I would first make sure all your needs have been met and any outstanding bills are paid so that your credit does not become damaged. See to it that you have squirreled away a small portion for a rainy day. It is always raining in one way or another. When those things have been done, then by all means do something special for you and the children.

Be open to something special being much smaller than a trip to Disney. After all, as my grandmother would say, “Disney ain’t going nowhere.”

Soul to soul,

Kiantha

Dear Kiantha can be read Fridays in The Spokesman-Review. To read this column in Spanish, visit www.spokesman.com. To submit a question, email DearKiantha@gmail.com.