Cheap Seats

Roger Williams, Live at Superior Court

Expect a CD soon from the pianist who last week serenaded the sequestered jurors in the O.J. Simpson double-murder trial. Williams, whose renditions of “Born Free” and “The Impossible Dream” have sold millions of records, had written to Superior Court Judge Lance Ito, offering a private concert.

“They are giving unselfishly of themselves to perform a civic duty of the highest order,” Williams said. “This is my way of saying thank you to them.”

Now hear him sing “Born Free O.J.” and “The Impossible Dream is Admissable Evidence.”

A blessing, but a curse

The good news for the Women’s Tennis Association tour: a sponsor willing to pony up $10 million. The bad news, as the WTA saw it: that sponsor was Tampax.

And so the WTA, though desperate to replace the money lost when it ended its association with Virginia Slims last year, snuffed out the offer from the feminine hygiene company for fear, in the words of WTA prez Martina Navratilova, “that the sport had the potential to be a laughingstock.

“We couldn’t risk losing the local sponsors, which is where our $35 million in prize money comes from, because they didn’t want to be associated with a WTA Tour presented by Tampax,” she said. “It shouldn’t be a stigma, but apparently it still is.”

Navratilova said she voted against acceptance because “it’s not our role to crusade to change public opinion and get people over their embarrassment.” And a WTA poll of marketing execs, players, tournament directors and media members suggested the embarrassment would spill over to women’s tennis.

“David Letterman would be doing Tampon Tour jokes every night,” one player said.

We here at the Cheap Seats can’t believe anyone would stoop so low for a laugh. We’re talking about the best players in the world, period.

I know you are, but what am I?

To those who think boxing doesn’t have standards, this crud’s for you. Promoter Mickey Duff was fined $8,000 last week for calling fighter Chris Eubank “scum” before a world title bout two months ago.

The British Boxing Board of Control - now there’s an oxymoron - said it was fining Duff for bringing the sport into disrepute. Duff promised an appeal.

The incident occurred on the eve of Eubank’s successful defense of the WBO-gus supermiddleweight title against Henry Wharton.

Duff, who manages Wharton, referred to Eubank as “scum” and “the lowest of the low” at a televised news conference.”

And boxing just hasn’t been the same since.

The last word …

“Of course, it would be just like the dastardly Blue Jays to claim they’re now a small-market team, and demand relief from baseball’s new revenue-sharing plan.”

- Baltimore Sun columnist Ken Rosenthal, on Toronto’s decision to play replacement games in Dunedin, Fla., pop. 36,000