David Hasselhoff’s Popularity Far Overreaches His Vocal Talent

David Hasselhoff is to pop music what Pamela Anderson is to acting.

The 12 songs on his new album, “No Stars,” sound as if they could easily be the soundtrack to Hasselhoff and Anderson’s “Baywatch.” They range from annoyingly vapid love ballads (“Do You Believe in Love,” “Miracle of Love”) to similarly bothersome faux dance-pop numbers with Rick Astley/ George Michael rhythms (“Give Me Something Real,” “Try a Little Tenderness”).

Hasselhoff’s shallow Paul Anka-styled vocals might be amusing if he didn’t take himself so seriously. As it is, though, they’re simply irritating.

For some reason, Hasselhoff’s music is a huge hit in Europe. Don’t let it happen here, too.

Please.