Tough Days Make Us What We Are
Here at Common Ground, we’ve long been a fan of Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, the death and dying pioneer. She has a new book out titled: “Death is of Vital Importance.” It’s a collection of her speeches from past years and every page contains wisdom. The topic - death - might seem like a downer, but trust us, you’ll feel happy and renewed after reading it. Here’s a sampling:
“I was born an unwanted child. Not that my parents didn’t want a child. They wanted a girl very badly, but a pretty, beautiful, 10-pound girl. They did not expect triplets and when I came, I was only two pounds. I was very ugly and I had no hair and I was a terribly big disappointment to my parents.
“So I had the tragedy of being born a triplet. I had the feeling that I had to prove all my life that even I, a twopound nothing, was worth something. I had to be born and raised this way in order to do this work. It took me 50 years to realize that there are no coincidences in life, and that the things we regard as tragedies are not really tragedies unless we choose to make tragedies out of them.
“Because we can also choose to regard them as chances for us, opportunities to grow, and then we see they are challenges that we may need to change our lives. When you are at the end of your life and look back, not at the easy days but at the tough days, at the windstorms of life, you see that the tough days are the ones that really made you what you are today.”
Ripple effect: One person’s addiction to alcohol or drugs has a ripple effect in a family. Children are often the primary victims. On Saturday at Colonial Clinic, 910 N. Washington, there will be a seminar that explores topics such as “identifying family systems that lead to violence” and “parenting for a non-violent home.” Cost is $30. For more information, call Julie at 327-9831.
Important info: The YWCA of Spokane is offering two free classes on breast health, one in the morning Oct. 24 and the other the afternoon of Oct. 26. The classes will discuss myth vs. reality regarding breast health and self-examination instruction. For more information, call Pam at 326-1190, ext. 18.
Good news: Survivors of childhood sexual abuse can move beyond victimhood and thrive, according to a University of Washington study recently presented at the annual meeting of the American Psychological Association. Individual therapy was the most commonly used resource and the one considered most essential for recovery by the survivors in the study.
Laura Anderson, the author of the study, said, “Individual therapy also was used for extensive time periods; 55 percent of the women used it for at least five years. Many victims of childhood sexual abuse don’t realize how much time and effort is involved in moving ahead with their lives. They can also feel bad about themselves when recovery takes longer then they think it should. Finding out what kind of time span is normal will allow survivors to know what to expect in terms of the ups and downs of the healing process.”
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