Reasons Diverse As Techniques
Make eye contact. Look away. Look back.
Touch your face. Lick your lips. Flip your hair. Arch your back.
That’s it! You’re flirting! But why? Are you trying to meet someone or just stay in practice? Here are some of your thoughts on flirting.
Tiffany: “It’s harmless and healthy when two people who are committed to each other flirt with others.
“My boyfriend and I are both terrible flirts. We went to a campus tavern together, had others buy us our drinks, and then left together and compared the pick-up lines we had received that night. Not only can we share the experience together, and have fun at the bar, but we can feel good about ourselves knowing that others find us attractive. Too many couples can’t share an experience like that and instead go to the bars with their buddies. When they want to party, they either leave their date at home or take them and resent them for being there and for curbing their fun. I’m lucky our relationship is solid enough and both of us are mature enough to have fun with each other.”
Rick: “My wife destroyed our marriage with her flirting. She called it ‘harmless’ and ‘fun’ and said I was too uptight to let loose and let her have her jollies. What is fun about watching your wife make a fool of herself in front of strangers and friends?
“She thought she was coming across as a wild and crazy gal, but I was told more than once that she was pathetic and I looked like a wuss for letting her get away with it. I got so sick of dealing with it, we got divorced.”
Kelly: “I don’t flirt because I’m not very good at it, but I tend to gravitate toward men who do. Maybe that’s why I find Latin men so attractive with their stereotypical roving eyes. My friends ask me if it doesn’t drive me crazy. It bothers me sometimes, but I secretly enjoy it, provided I’m the one he leaves the party with.
“I like a man who appreciates beautiful things. To me, it’s a sign of a self-assured, passionate, romantic nature, a person who knows how to get the most out of life. A partner who flirts can’t ever be taken for granted and that helps keep the excitement alive in a relationship.”
Vanessa: “Flirting eases tension.”
Russell: “I love to flirt. After I’ve had a lousy day at work, I love to go to a bar and pick out the hottest girl there to see if I can get her to come over to me. If I can, the night’s a success. If she buys me a drink, I feel like I’ve hit a home run. If she comes home with me, the bases were loaded.”
Ellen: “Flirting is disrespectful. My boyfriend said he was just being outgoing and friendly, but I don’t buy it. Being friendly does not entail sexual innuendoes. When I think back to some of the things I tolerated, my stomach churns.”
Trisha: “I’ve learned that flirting is in the mind of the beholder. I’ll be out with my boyfriend and think I’m just being friendly. But if he does the same thing I do, he’s a slobbering jerk.”
Tom: “My girlfriend and I use flirting to keep our relationship healthy. Before we met, we were both pretty good flirts. Now, we occasionally go out together, separate, and then slip into ‘club style’ small talk with a stranger to find out if the person is married, single, alone, etc.
“Ultimately, it comes out that we’re deeply in love with someone. The answers we give to questions reveal our devotion to each other. For instance, I might say, ‘You have beautiful green eyes, just like my girlfriend.’ Or she might say, ‘My boyfriend is hot stuff.’ We listen in and it’s a great way to pass along compliments.”