Cheap Seats
Today’s gratuitous shot at Greg Norman
At the most recent PGA Tour players’ meeting, Mr. Gag-Me-With-a-Spoon (or a brassie) groused about NBC analyst Johnny Miller focusing on Tom Watson’s putting woes. Then at the Masters, Norman heard that CBS analyst Peter Kostis said Norman was fighting his swing. According to Sports Illustrated, Norman “hit the ceiling” and called CBS’ Frank Chirkinian Sunday morning - pre-choke - to complain.
Reported conversation: “You want to see fighting my swing? I’ll show you fighting my swing!”
He’s in the Angels’ little black book now
With Heidi Fleiss out of circulation, Charlie Sheen has to spend his money elsewhere. So he plopped down $5,000 to sit with three friends in a section of Anaheim Stadium, hoping to catch a baseball.
Sheen bought out all the seats behind the left-field fence for last Friday’s game between the Angels and Tigers. He sat about 20 rows back, pounding a glove in anticipation of a home run that never came.
“Anybody can catch a foul ball,” he said. “I want to catch a fair ball. But I didn’t want to crawl over the paying public. I wanted to avoid the violence.”
Sheen recently divorced his wife of nearly six months, saying he married the wrong person.
That must have been her spending $5,000 of her alimony check to buy out a section in foul territory.
Great moments in sports promotion
Days after the San Jose Clash drew a sellout crowd of 31,683, Major League Soccer chairman Alan Rothenberg appeared at a luncheon to promote the Los Angeles Galaxy’s home opener.
“If Southern California can’t beat (in attendance) a rinky-dink town up north,” Rothenberg challenged, “then something is wrong.”
We can hardly wait for Fan Depreciation Night.
Just thought you’d like to know …
The upper deck at Comiskey Park offers such distant viewing Chicagoans call it Mount Shafted …
If the Chisox’s Frank Thomas is the Big Hurt, the A’s Mark McGwire must be the Big Always Hurt …
John Eisenberg of the Baltimore Sun calls the Boston Red Sox: “Baseball’s latest work stoppage …”
Hey, but the refs never keep score
The ball from win No. 70 of the Chicago Bulls nearly took a one-way trip to the open market. When the horn sounded, Bulls equipment manager John Ligamanowski tried to wrestle the ball away from referee Joe Forte. But Forte managed to hang on, and retreated to the officials’ dressing room. However, Bucks officials went to Forte, asked for the ball and got it. Then they turned it over to the Bulls.
The last word …
“If the No. 70 were so significant, it would be in Roman numerals, like wars and Super Bowls. It would be LXX, not to be confused with XXL, which is Jerry Krause’s sweater size.”
- Bernie Lincicome of the Chicago Tribune, on the Bulls winning 70 games
, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: Photo