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The Spokesman-Review Newspaper
Spokane, Washington  Est. May 19, 1883

Rules For The Playground Are Also Good Rules For A Lifetime

Dan’s temper is as black as his hair.

“Why are you angry?” playground supervisor Jane Frohlich asked gently, her hand on the fifth-grader’s head.

“He ruined my tunnel,” he said through clenched teeth.

“Be calm. It’s all right. You can finish next recess,” said Frohlich.

Dan’s jaw loosens, he zips his jacket and runs off to class. He’s been Frohlich-ed, as Deer Park Elementary students have been for four years.

“I tell them: it’s OK to be mad, it’s not okay to be mean,” said Frohlich.

Her Success Skills class catches students bounced for unruly recess behavior and teaches them the rules for childhood’s social proving ground.

The rules to the important games. How to make friends. How to defuse anger. How to have fun.

Those skills used to be learned by osmosis, educators say. But today’s kids need to be taught basic manners.

“We’re giving kids different information now, from TV and movies,” said Deer Park Elementary principal Bob Rundell. “It’s all violence and cutting down.

“What she’s doing is giving the kids the information so they can make better choices.”

The class originated when school counselor Donna Hargrave noticed increased and similar problems on the playground. It was folded into discipline policy, which emphasizes self-assessment and anger management.

The 48-year-old mother of two grown boys approaches the lessons like a nurturing cheerleader, frequently repeating, “You bet!”

“First I’d tell you that you aren’t bad or naughty,” she said.

Then she teaches how to make friends. Introduce yourself, ask your acquaintance their name and interests, then invite them to play.

Then come the social rules. Fights and insults don’t win friends. Respect for others is hip. Go to the back of the line.

To cement the rules, she has students role-play and watch videos on anger management.

If the students flub playground rules after going to class, they are bumped down the discipline chain, to a less friendly environment.

Frohlich said her students rarely mess up again.

“The alternative to this is the Solutions Room. They don’t want to go there,” said Frohlich.

She is quickly distracted by two boys fighting on a snow bank.

“He’s trying to beat me up,” said a first-grader in a green Sonics coat.

“What do you say?” Frohlich asked the boy. “Put your shoulders back, your chin up.”

“Please don’t,” the boy told his antagonist.

“You bet! That’s wonderful, Wesley,” said Frolich.

, DataTimes