Next Time, He’ll Be Sure To Mention Mercedes

When Brad Pitt received a Golden Globe award as best supporting actor for his performance in “12 Monkeys,” he spoke straight from the, er, stomach.

“I’d like to thank … actually the makers of Kaopectate,” Pitt told the audience in his acceptance speech. “They’ve done a great service for their fellow man.”

After the awards ceremony was over, he added: “I have a nervous stomach, and it works. I’ll be expecting those calls from Kaopectate any minute now.”

And call they did. As a publicist for Pharmacia & Upjohn pharmaceuticals told Entertainment Weekly: “We’re very pleased that Brad’s pleased. I don’t know if we’ll send him a lifetime supply, but certainly enough to get him through the Academy Awards.”

Loose talk

Joely Fisher (“Ellen”), on her big-screen career (in InStyle magazine): “Well, I did have a small part in ‘I’ll Do Anything’ … Look, I wish my first movie was ‘Sophie’s Choice,’ but it’s not.” Oh, what a tangled web she’s about to weave

Laura Dern turns 29 today.

Ah, the good old days, back before the bomb

Pitt co-star Bruce Willis, who plays a time traveler in “12 Monkeys,” wouldn’t mind having one of the gizmos in real life: “I’d like to go back in time to when I could meet Jesus. I’d like to go back in time to when I had more hair. And most important, I’d like to go back to three weeks before I decided to do ‘Hudson Hawk.”’

Even an ape prefers a more cultured approach

Faye Dunaway, who plays opposite an ape in “Dunston Checks In,” wallowed in gooey pink cake batter and allowed directors to smear various foods on her face until they found one that the film’s orangutan, Sam, would lick off. “Blueberry yogurt finally did the trick,” she said.

Well, she’s already clipped Hugh’s wings

Forgiving Hugh Grant girlfriend Liz Hurley will play the part of Delilah in an upcoming film version of the Samson story, with Dennis Hopper as a Philistine villain. Delilah, as you may recall from the biblical tale, cut Samson’s hair to destroy his strength.

Prism, perhaps, but Marilyn had an hourglass

Ashley Judd, who portrays the young Marilyn Monroe in the forthcoming HBO film “Norma Jean & Marilyn,” on true beauty: “It’s a prism through which a lot of colors are radiated. The colors that are most important to me are things like inner peace and understanding, and those are the things that Marilyn lacked.”

Guess that’s what they mean by critical reaction

Finally, this tale from the Columbia Journalism Review: When a Daily Variety reporter interviewed Hollywood mogul Michael Ovitz over lunch, she had an immediate, violent allergic response to MSG in her meal. After the less than complimentary piece appeared, Ovitz sent her a gift-wrapped package containing a jar of MSG and a note: “Enjoy.”

, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: 2 Color Photos

The following fields overflowed: CREDIT = Compiled by staff writer Rick Bonino