Start Saving Your Money

Dear Ann Landers: I’m a 58-year-old woman. Three months ago, I had a face lift. The doctor was board certified in plastic surgery and the procedure was done in a reputable hospital.

I was horrified when I discovered the doctor did not do my upper neck - the area directly under my chin - where I had quite a lot of loose skin. When I asked, he told me not to worry and said that I looked fine.

I wrote a letter of complaint against this doctor to the medical committee, and I am still waiting to hear the result.

On my next visit, the doctor said he had heard about my letter of complaint and offered to do liposuction on my neck free of charge. I consulted with two other surgeons, and both agreed that my doctor took a shortcut and liposuction will not give me the contour I want.

What I really want is some of my money back so I can have another surgeon do it right. I’m depressed and feel cheated. I don’t have the money to pay for another procedure. Since I didn’t get the complete face lift I paid for, I think I’m entitled to a refund. I can’t afford to take this doctor to court. What should I do? - Niagara Falls, N.Y.

Dear Niagara: Accept the fact that your plastic surgeon did a poor job and start to save money for a remedial procedure.

As you know, court battles are costly, time-consuming and often gut-wrenching. Be aware that liposuction is a procedure that sucks the fat out of a specific area. It will not help correct the problem of loose skin.

Sorry about your tough luck, but fortunately, this is not a major glitch and can be easily corrected. It’s just going to take time and more money.

Dear Ann Landers: “Ed” and I have been married for nine years. I love him a lot, but something is bothering me.

Ed has a serious weight problem, which he recognizes. He feels he should handle this on his own and is angry and frustrated because he isn’t making any headway. Whenever I bring up the subject, I get a cold stare and icy responses for the remainder of the evening. He refuses to get a checkup and hasn’t seen a doctor in almost three years.

On two occasions, Ed has lost a great deal of weight on liquid diets. Each time, he has gained most of it back. Aside from the fact that these fad diets can be dangerous, it is clear that they do not work for Ed.

I make healthy, low-fat meals, and he seems to enjoy them, but I have found candy wrappers and empty pastry bags in the house and in Ed’s car. This is very upsetting to me.

I have tried to ignore the situation, but this makes me feel like an “enabler.” It would be helpful if I could find a support group similar to Al-Anon, but I haven’t located any so far. Can you help? - Stumped in D.C.

Dear D.C.: Understand that you are powerless to help Ed. He needs counseling to deal with his addiction. Overeaters Anonymous would be great, but you can’t drag him.

I suggest that you attend a few meetings and connect with others who have this problem with their spouses. Can’t hurt. Might help. Good luck.

Lonesome? Take charge of your life and turn it around. Write for Ann Landers’ new booklet, “How to Make Friends and Stop Being Lonely.” Send a self-addressed, long, business-size envelope and a check or money order for $4.25 (this includes postage and handling) to: Friends, c/o Ann Landers, P.O. Box 11562, Chicago, Ill. 60611-0562.