Small Screen Could Do Without ‘Heroes’
“What would you rather do: Lose an eye or get married?”
The response: “Lose an eye. You can only see half as well, but at least the scenery changes.”
That’s a sampling of the kind of gross-out jokes dominating FOX’s latest half-hour sitcom “Local Heroes,” premiering Sunday at 9:30. The show is set in a working-class community where four high-school buddies pine away for their old school days when their football team was town champion.
Now their alma mater is a loser just as they are - and just like this comedy that probably will last for about six weeks.
The high-school buddies (Ken Hudson Campbell, Jason Kristofer, Jay Mohr and Justin Louis) have contempt for most women, except those in tight T-shirts in the “cold, very cold rain.” Marriage is considered a dirty word, and their jokes center on butcher shops and pacemakers.
In the first episode, the boys decide to steal a rival school’s mascot. As you might guess, they steal the wrong one. Are you laughing yet?
OK, this half-hour isn’t going to win an award for originality. But that’s the least of its problems.
Highlights
“NCAA Basketball Tournament,” CBS today and Sunday at 9 a.m.: The hoop action today goes non-stop until about 6 p.m. - the commercials notwithstanding, that is. On Sunday, there’s seven hours worth of coverage.
“World of Discovery,” ABC tonight at 8: “Tiger: Lord of the Wild,” postponed from an earlier date, is a documentary on efforts to save tigers from extinction. James Brolin narrates the standout nature film.
“Dateline Sunday,” NBC Sunday at 7: This newsmagazine show kicks off its newest edition with an interview with Olympic skater Ekaterina Gordeeva. Her longtime partner and husband Sergei Grinkov died last November at age 28.
“Forever Young” (1992), NBC Sunday at 9: Back for another airing is this teary tale about a frozen man (Mel Gibson) who is defrosted after 50 years. He embarks on a long search for remnants of his former life.
Jamie Lee Curtis plays a young woman who, with assistance from her son (Elijah Wood), helps Gibson’s character find his way. It’s all less than satisfying, but it will clear out your tear ducts.
“Last Action Hero” (1993), ABC Sunday at 9: An 11-year-old’s dream of battling crime alongside his matinee idol (Arnold Schwarzenegger) comes true with the help of a “magic ticket.” Both Schwarzenegger and his young co-star, Austin O’Brien, need more than magic to keep this film from falling apart.
The script is flat, and the movie-making in-jokes are too inside for us outsiders. The action sequences are impressive, but they are too violent for youngsters.
“A Husband, a Wife and a Lover” (1996), CBS Sunday at 9: The unknown entity is this love-triangle tale starring Judith Light. It was unavailable for review.
Talented Light (“Who’s the Boss?”) usually turns up in notable TV movies. This one includes co-star Jay Thomas as a deceitful husband who suffers a stroke and William Russ as a boarder who offers new opportunities to the long-suffering wife (Light).
“The Simpsons,” FOX Sunday at 8: Kirk Douglas lends his voice to this episode that spoofs cartoon violence.
“The Show,” FOX Sunday at 8:30 (unavailable for review): This new fish-out-of-water comedy is about a snow-white comedy writer (Sam Seder) who lands a job on a black variety talk show.