Who Needs Those Smart Guys Anyway?

We’re occasionally accused of being down on Spokane, a charge we reject.

But we’ve got to admit we keep company with some pretty dyspeptic folks. After The Slice asked who is the smartest person in the Spokane area, the most popular answer was various versions of “The guy who’s leaving tomorrow.”

Has anyone in history ever used the phrases: “Out East” or “Back West”?

Of course, of course: A colleague was cruising through cyberia when she came across a list of reasons why owning a horse is a better idea than having kids. They included:

Horses never say “She’s repeating me, she keeps looking at me.”

Horses don’t throw up in your bed.

Horses never complain about their food - “Grain again! We just had that last night.”

Horses are never embarrassed to be seen with you no matter what you look like that day.

Don’t let anyone get away with: Saying this or that boneheaded attitude is simply the result of someone having grown up in the West. Remember, there’s no such thing as a single one-size-fits-all “Western” point of view.

Just wondering: When you glimpse yourself on a TV screen in a bank or electronics store, do you like what you see or feel the urge to scream?

Phone tag: Spokane’s Jeannie Greene and her young daughter, Kelley, were gazing at the stars. And Kelley asked her mom what she would wish for.

“Well, it would be nice to have more money,” she answered.

“Just ask God,” suggested Kelley.

Her mom said God might be too busy to deal with such a request.

But Kelley, a ‘90s kid, had an idea. “Then just put it on his answering machine.”

Overheard at Travo’s: “Oh, yeah, I remember dirt clod fights.” - a guy at a table of four men who were busy recalling childhood.

Tube pick: Andy Griffith wasn’t always an old man, you know. Want proof? OK, AMC offers up “No Time for Sergeants” twice tonight.

“PLO” will never sound the same.

Today’s Slice question: What bold act of food-theft by one of the pets does your family still talk about?