Cheap Seats

Ministering to the railbirds

Joe DiDonato, who rebuilt a chapel at the Meadows harness racing track outside Pittsburgh, was a bit skeptical before he was hired as track minister three years ago.

The Assemblies of God minister said he thought his job would be to counsel people who had lost a lot of money, and that was a turnoff.

But then he learned of a need for a pastor at the busy track, where schedules don’t always include time for religion.

So DiDonato rolled up his sleeves and carpeted the cobwebbed chapel in one of the tack rooms. Services, Bible camp and Sunday school followed. His annual Thanksgiving dinner now attracts 200 people, including drivers and their families.

His best advice: God to win, Jesus to place, and you better show.

Driving for dough

Don’t expect to see a long-drive contest between Tiger Woods and John Daly during the Skins Game on ABC-TV this weekend from California’s La Quinta Country Club.

“It’s not about length. It’s about birdies,” Woods said. “And I’m going to go out there and try to make as many birdies as I possibly can and win some skins. That’s my goal.”

Woods, Daly, Tom Watson and Fred Couples, a pretty long hitter himself, will make up the Skins foursome, vying for $540,000 in prize money.

“One of the problems if I try to get that extra length, I lose my accuracy,” Woods said.

So his approach shots will be 100 yards instead of 90.

They’re flying now

Akron, Ohio, meet the Aeros.

After three attempts, the Ohio city seems to have agreed on the name Aeros for its minor league baseball team. This one has a good chance of sticking because it was chosen by residents.

Name No. 2, the Blast, lasted 2-1/2 weeks. It fell victim to a backlash from fans and officials who complained the name was insensitive in the hometown of an astronaut killed in the explosion of the space shuttle Challenger.

The team was known as the Canton-Akron Indians while it played at Canton’s Thurman Munson Memorial Stadium.

BFGoodrich, an aerospace company, is based in Akron, NASA has a research center in Cleveland, astronaut John Glenn is an Ohio senator and Orville and Wilbur Wright developed and designed their planes in Dayton.

And let’s not forget Aerosmith, a sure bet to get into Cleveland’s Rock ‘n’ Roll Hall of Fame.

At least Rosie Ruiz could spell, we think

Tom Sweeney, a doorman at the St. Francis Drake Hotel, ran in the New York City Marathon and was amused when the runner in front of him at the start was disqualified for wearing a counterfeit number. How did they know it was a fake?

The word “marathon” was spelled “maraton.”

Said Sweeney, “He was disqualified for bad spelling.”

The last word …

“The reigning Miss Canada has been arrested for punching out another woman in a bar fight. … A beauty pageant contestant who can fight. That sounds like Mike Tyson’s worst nightmare, doesn’t it?” - Jay Leno

, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: Photo