It Can Be A Stealth Phenomenon
If love were always accompanied by violins or at least strolling violinists, it would be easy to recognize. But sometimes, all you hear is an a cappella version of “Button Up Your Overcoat.”
I knew it was love …
… when he helped me on with my coat and sang, ‘Button up your overcoat when the wind is free. Take good care of yourself you belong to me.”’ …
when Jim and I were saying good night after our first date. I asked him if he wanted to see a movie with me later in the week. He said, ‘Sounds great, Greg’ and then kissed me. I started to laugh because I always say that to mean yes. It’s a funny line from an old ‘Brady Bunch’ episode. We became engaged five months later. We’ve been married four years. I hope we’ll always be as happy as the Brady family.”
… when he postponed a planned camping trip with friends to baby-sit my 2-year-old daughter who had the chicken pox. We had only been dating for a short time. When he called to say goodbye, I was edgy from a lack of sleep and not looking forward to calling in sick for a second day. He told me not to worry and arrived at my house 20 minutes later. He said he was there to give me some assistance and relieve me so I could go to work. He said my daughter and I were more important to him than any camping trip. We are now happily married.”
… when I suggested we go to the Field Museum to see the shrunken heads. We combed the place and he finally asked for directions. For any man to ask for directions, it has to be love.”
… when I realized what I’m willing to do for him. I’m 43 and divorced and have been dating the same man for four years. During this time I have asked myself a million times, ‘Is it love?’ Sure, I’ll run his errands for him, take care of him if he’s sick, pick him up at the airport. But I would do that for any friend. The real key for me was when I knew I would donate my kidney to him. I know it may sound corny, but that’s when I knew it was love.”
… when I accepted a date with a guy who’s a quadriplegic. I wasn’t interested in a serious relationship but I thought he was a nice guy that I could share an evening with occasionally. He took me out to dinner a few times and on our fourth date, he asked if he could cook for me. When I arrived at his place, he was stirring a chicken casserole he had made. When I saw the effort it took him to do something as simple as stirring a dish, I realized how much work had gone into preparing the meal. I knew that I loved him. One year and a lot of home cooked meals later, we’re engaged.”
… I thought it was love when I was only 20, very impressionable and in love with love. I was also engaged to be married. Then, my mother died. A year later, my father died, leaving me with two little brothers, 10 and 6. I told my fiance that I couldn’t marry him because I had a family to take care of. His reply: ‘What does that have to do with it? Can’t we all live together?’
“Then I knew it was love, for the package also included my paternal grandfather who had lived with us since I was a baby. They all loved each other. In our 55 years together, my husband and I never had a quarrel. We didn’t always agree, but one of us would walk out of the room, pout a little, then eventually return and start talking again.
“One day I asked him what he wanted for lunch and he didn’t answer. After the funeral, one of my brothers told me he always thought of my husband as his father. I wish I had known that, for we never had any children of our own. It was love and it will never be over.”