Terror In Ghost Falls Only The Post Falls Lions Club Knows What Evil Lurks In Its Halloween Haunted House

There were no ghosts yet, no ghouls either. Just a grinning member of the Post Falls Lions Club.

Still, when John Criswell opened the door of the old fire-gutted house Sunday afternoon, a thick, palpable blackness filled the entrance like year-old motor oil.

“One thing I’ll do is get a flashlight,” Criswell said, “‘cause we don’t want to go in there without a flashlight.”

For about 16 years, the battered wood building at Post and Fourth has housed the club’s haunted house. The place will open again Wednesday, giving fright-lovers the opportunity to gulp its musty air, squeeze blindly through its lab-rat maze and be chased by chain-saw-wielding teenagers.

Most get through it OK, Criswell assured. But others don’t.

“I’ve had people crawl all the way through on their hands and knees,” Criswell bragged.

No monsters had punched in, it being Sunday. But Criswell offered to show the place off anyway. He flicked on his flashlight, which cast a weak, jaundiced circle on the floor.

“This is a wonderful place to bring your honey,” Criswell said as his guest smacked into a wall. No, this way. Watch out for the door. Duck. Don’t worry about that stuff hanging from the ceiling.

There was light up ahead. It was a sloping, strobe-lighted room - its floor, ceiling and walls painted with glowing circles. Up was left, down was right. The guest’s irises opened and closed like camera shutters. “It’s very effective,” Criswell said.

The narrow, coiling hallways turned hither and thither. Criswell vanished through a portal.

“The spider webs and cobwebs - these are not fake,” he said.

In places the floor turned soft, damp and springy.

Then the guide showed the rooms where Freddy Krueger, Medusa, glowing, horned skulls and other horrors would soon lurk.

On Wednesday night, the house will be filled with about 20 horrible creatures - all members of the Post Falls High School band.

Criswell said 75 folks wander through the house at a time.

All told, 3,000 to 4,000 “customers” are expected in the eight days before Halloween, raising about $20,000 for the club.

Most spook buffs come from Spokane or Coeur d’Alene. Some travel farther.

“We always get a group from Rosalia, Ritzville. There’s a group from Bonners Ferry that comes every year,” Criswell said.

The ones who get really scared are “these big, brave boys,” he said with a laugh. While waiting to get in, they tell their buddies how nothing will scare them.

Then they eat their words.

“It’s the fear of the unknown,” Criswell said, sounding a bit like Rod Serling.

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MEMO: This sidebar appeared with the story: Grisly details The haunted house will open Wednesday and continue through Halloween. Hours are 6:30-10 p.m. Sundays and weekdays; 6:30 p.m. to midnight Fridays and Saturdays. Admission is $3 for students, $5 for adults.