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The Spokesman-Review Newspaper
Spokane, Washington  Est. May 19, 1883

Don’t Assume Motorists See You

Ann Landers Creators Syndicate

Dear Ann Landers: I always wondered how a pedestrian could be hit by a car in a crosswalk. I know now. I cannot count the number of times I’ve seen pedestrians step blindly into an intersection crosswalk when the light turns to “Walk.” Do they stop to see if oncoming traffic notices them? No, they do not. They just figure the driver will see them and hit the brakes. They march directly into the street, assuming that because they have the right of way, the cars will stop.

What they do not know is that the driver in an oncoming car just got fired, had a fight with his wife or is trying to find the lighted cigarette he just dropped. The pedestrian may have the right of way, but being right isn’t enough when you’re laid up in the hospital or, worse yet, in the cemetery.

Wake up, you idiots. Your life is your responsibility, and if you value it, you will not assume that all drivers are sober, considerate and interested in keeping you alive. - A.H. in Sacramento, Calif.

Dear A.H.: Thank you for all the readers you may have saved today. Your message is clear: Don’t assume a driver sees you or that he is competent, sober and alert. The one who isn’t could cost you your life.

Dear Ann Landers: A while back you printed your annual column on Reconciliation Day and talked about the importance of keeping in touch with family members and friends who have drifted away. That letter impressed me so much, I decided to write to my brother, who is a preacher in a southern state, and “reconnect.” We’d had a falling out and had not spoken to one another for several years.

I wrote him a nice letter saying we should let bygones be bygones and enjoy the years we had left. He responded at once with a letter saying he didn’t see any point in trying to get together because I was “too much like Dad - bullheaded, a know-it-all, etc., etc.” Actually, Dad was a decent, hard-working family man, but he was hard to please and not very affectionate. Being a girl, I really missed having a father who would hug me like some of my friends had, but I understood that my father was not a hugger, and I accepted him the way he was.

I really feel bad about the way my brother shut the door on me. He is missing out on being part of a big, loving family. He has three kids whom I would love to know. Sad, isn’t it? I think about it often. Just sign me - A Sister in Dayton, Ohio

Dear Sister: Your brother is the loser. He doesn’t know what he is missing. How sad that he is also depriving his children of the pleasure of knowing you and their cousins. I hope he sees this and changes his mind. Let me know if it happens. It would make my day.

Dear Ann Landers: I am a single woman in my early 30s with a good job and an active social life. I don’t drink or do drugs, and I lead a fairly happy life. So what’s my problem? My mother thinks it would be better if I were married, and she can’t understand why I don’t “find a man.”

Mom has always harped on this subject because I have had few boyfriends, and I’ve never really taken her seriously. As I get older, her comments are more frequent and increasingly hurtful. I don’t want to stop talking to my mother, but how can I let her know that her harping is becoming unbearable? - Vancouver, Wash.

Dear Van.: Tell your mother that from now on, the subject of finding a man is strictly verboten and you don’t want the subject brought up ever again. Let her know that if she doesn’t respect your wishes, you will promptly leave the room. Then do it.