Hardball, Soft Money, Loose Cannons, Lost Bags

“Eenie, meenie, chili beanie, the spirits are about to speak.”

Or something like that.

With 1998 dawning later this week, we’ve come to our final chance to make 32 fearless predictions about year-tocome in politics. In a break with tradition - and in honor of the explosion of tribal gambling in Washington state - wagering is not only permitted, it is required.

1. Former Washington Gov. Mike Lowry will allow rumors to spread that he’s a candidate for the U.S. Senate because Patty Murray is too conservative.

2. Republicans in the state Legislature will pay for improvements to highways with a new tax on labor unions.

3. Former Seattle Seahawks player Steve Largent will endorse Linda Smith for Senate and John Kitna for quarterback.

4. Compassion will drive the Legislature to legalize the use of marijuana but only for the terminally ill and people who smell of patchouli oil.

5. Tacoma city officials will announce a new city slogan: “A chicken in every pot and a parking garage for every car.”

6. Gov. Gary Locke will be touted as a possible running mate if Al Gore is nominated for president.

7. Paul Allen will make generous campaign contributions against all legislators who voted no on the Seahawks stadium measure last year.

8. Citing the extra time it takes to process vote-by-mail ballots, Secretary of State Ralph Munro will try to move the 1998 primary to 1997.

9. KVI radio host John Carlson will allow rumors to spread that he’s a candidate for the U.S. Senate because Linda Smith is too conservative.

10. In order to jump start his U.S. Senate campaign, Pierce County Executive Doug Sutherland will challenge Linda Smith to a debate.

11. Paul Allen will make generous campaign contributions against all legislators who raised questions about the Seahawks stadium measure last year.

12. Mainstream Republicans of Washington will announce plans to retake the state party - just as soon as they find a fourth for pinochle.

13. KVI radio host John Carlson will use his chairmanship of Initiative 200 as a steppingstone to the U.S. Senate.

14. Fresh from getting spanked by the Justice Department, Microsoft will significantly increase its contributions to state and federal candidates.

15. Due to a perceived racial slight by a local party official, state Democrats will move their convention from Yakima to Mike Lowry’s back yard.

16. Conservative Christians will take over the state GOP convention in Richland and condemn Linda Smith for being too liberal.

17. State Rep. Scott Smith will use his sponsorship of Initiative 200 as a steppingstone to the Pierce County Auditor’s office.

18. In order to jump start his U.S. Senate campaign, Pierce County Executive Doug Sutherland will challenge Patty Murray to a debate.

19. Paul Allen will make generous campaign contributions against all legislators who did not drop to one knee during his lobbying visits to promote the Seahawks stadium measure last year.

20. In order to soften their image, sponsors of Initiative 200 will run TV ads featuring the Disney tune “It’s a Small World.”

21. Gov. Gary Locke will be touted as a possible running mate if Dick Gephardt is nominated for president.

22. Iran-Contra figure Oliver North will accuse anyone who hasn’t served in the Marines of being anti-American.

23. Nationally known lesbian activist and 2nd District congressional candidate Greta Cammermeyer will wonder why she doesn’t draw bigger crowds in Lynden and Sedro Woolley.

24. President Bill Clinton will condemn the influence of soft money during a $10,000-a-plate fund raising dinner.

25. Gov. Gary Locke will be touted as a possible running mate if Lynden LaRouche is nominated for president.

26. The Natural Law Party’s field of candidates will meditate together in an attempt to win a single newspaper endorsement.

27. After a contentious legislative session, Gov. Gary Locke will return to China in search of public adoration.

28. Linda Smith will condemn political action committee money on TV ads paid for by the Republican National Committee.

29. U.S. Sen. Slade Gorton will spend the entire state GOP convention in Richland with his head in his hands.

30. Because vote by mail still is used for less than half the vote, Pierce County Auditor Cathy Pearsall-Stipek will reintroduce the poll tax.

31. In order to jump start his U.S. Senate campaign, Pierce County Executive Doug Sutherland will challenge Mike Lowry to a debate.

32. After a contentious legislative session, Gov. Gary Locke will return to China in search of his luggage.

xxxx

The following fields overflowed: CREDIT = Peter Callaghan McClatchy News Service