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Sunday, October 13, 2019  Spokane, Washington  Est. May 19, 1883
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News >  Features

The Slice Just In Case They Serve Brussels Sprouts In Heaven

Bailey Johnson, 4, informed her mother that she plans to take some food along when she goes to heaven.

Why? “They might not have the things I like,” she explained.

Drop the big one: You know praising something by referring to it as “The bomb” has become passe when Alex Trebec uses that phrase to promote a teen week on “Jeopardy.”

Slice answer: “I am the only one in my family who knows how to milk a cow,” wrote Chattaroy’s Nancy Hartley. “The rest were too smart to learn. You know no matter how many showers you take or how many times you wash your hands, that horrible ‘had my hands on a cow’s udder’ smell takes days to go away.”

This lad is not crazy: When the rodeo was in town, this one little boy was watching a TV commercial promoting the event. The voice-over alluded to free pony rides for kids just as the screen flashed images of a bucking bronco. The boy looked at the high-kicking horse. Then he said he didn’t have any desire whatsoever to ride those particular ponies.

Rat Pack 101: “Ocean’s Eleven” shows up twice tonight on AMC. This boozy Vegas caper features Frank, Deano and the whole swingin’ gang.

Spokane teens in the news: The Rocket, a Seattle-based music and entertainment publication, has a feature where it prints notes, letters, et cetera found in public places by strangers. A recent issue included a missive reportedly discovered on a classroom floor at Ferris High. In it, the note’s author tells about a classmate taking off her shirt, presumably in mixed company, in exchange for “one ciggerette.”

But there’s good news, too. The note’s author, whose name is blacked out, goes on to say she personally wouldn’t do that.

So there’s hope for the future.

If you’ve already tossed out your continuing education class schedule from the Community Colleges of Spokane: You might want to get your hands on another copy. The variety of offerings is impressive.

Reasons to stay in denial: 1. Several popular antibiotics are becoming ineffective. 2. Millions of people enjoy pornography. 3. Anyone who really wants your credit card numbers can get them. 4. Pro wrestling.

Today’s Slice question: Judging from the evidence, what appears to be Spokane’s mission statement?

, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: Drawing

MEMO: The Slice appears Monday, Tuesday, Friday and Saturday. Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; fax (509) 459-5098. At least one reader got a kick out of seeing a pizza delivered to the back door of a popular Spokane Valley restaurant.

The Slice appears Monday, Tuesday, Friday and Saturday. Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; fax (509) 459-5098. At least one reader got a kick out of seeing a pizza delivered to the back door of a popular Spokane Valley restaurant.

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