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The Spokesman-Review Newspaper
Spokane, Washington  Est. May 19, 1883

Cheap Seats

The joy of sax

One thing we learned from the interminable bowl season: Arizona State football coach Bruce Snyder likes to play the saxophone.

He admits he’s not very good and that, when he plays, his family retreats to the back of the house.

“I find it impossible to play and think of anything else,” he said. “My mind can’t wander when I do it, so when I’m done, I find myself really refreshed. I’m kind of cleansed.”

No wonder, then, that it’s President Clinton’s instrument, too.

Silver linings

Parkinson’s syndrome has slowed Muhammad Ali, but the former heavyweight boxing champion called his illness “a blessing.”

“I always liked to chase the girls,” he says in the Jan. 13 issue of People magazine. “Parkinson’s stops all that. Now I might have a chance to go to heaven.”

His illness has left Ali, 55, with slurred speech and slowness of movement. But it hasn’t robbed him of his wit.

When asked what his plans are for the future, Ali, a Muslim, said: “Go to Mecca, pray five times a day and stay pretty.”

Ownership has its privileges

The U.S. Golf Association received a favorable ruling in a California court last month protecting its handicap system from a software company.

A judge ruled that the terms “USGA,” “Handicap Index,” “Slope,” and “Course Handicap” are distinct service marks owned exclusively by the USGA.

We, meanwhile, own exclusive rights to the term “mulligan.”

Mr. Sensitive

Miami Heat coach Pat Riley, that old softy, says the NBA should have a schedule break around Christmas.

“I think there should be at least three or four days that you don’t play at all,” he said. “I really think they should get to that.”

Of course, Riley held a practice for the Heat at noon on Christmas Day.

Must be a filosophy major

Jerry Walsh, the new football coach at Idaho State, has his approach already mapped out: “Fast, focus, flexible, fun, family and futuristic.”

Best of all, he’s no freaking Brian McNeely.

Hell freezes over

And Rutgers-Camden wins. The Pioneers went an NCAA-record 117 games and almost five years between basketball victories, but that’s all history after them beat Bloomfield 77-72 this week - prompting a crowd of 100 people to pile onto the court.

“We’re on a one-game winning streak,” freshman Dawan Boxley said.

The Pioneers last won on Jan. 18, 1992 - but could have ended the streak in 1995 when Rowan College used an ineligible player in an 85-56 win. But then-coach Wilbur Wilson said he didn’t want a “gift.”

No gift this, especially for the losers - though Bloomfield coach Mike Mancino told his players: “If this is the worst thing that happens to you in your life, you’ve got a pretty good life.”

The last word …

“They might as well make us play naked out there.”

- Phoenix Coyotes goalie Darcy Wakaluk, on the NHL’s crackdown on excessively wide pads

, DataTimes