Water Reflects Emotions, Gives Clues

Dear Nancy: I am a 70-year-old woman and have been married for 35 years. Our marriage has been difficult and we have had several separations. My husband and I have our own business. It hasn’t been easy to work with him and I look forward to retirement in the next year or two. This recent dream has me puzzled. Barbara

I am in a boat that is floating down a river with some friends. On my right I see a dead horse lying on the shore, partially submerged. On the return trip up the river I see the horse again and point it out to my friends.

Dear Barbara: Water often represents the dreamer’s emotional life and the appearance of the water can give the dreamer clues to his emotional state. Is it a stormy sea, or a calm, peaceful lake? Is the river raging, or is it gently flowing?

In your dream, Barbara, the water is peaceful going up and down the stream but the fact that you saw the horse twice indicates that it is important for you to notice.

Animals, in dreams, often symbolize our instinctual nature - the instinct for survival, intuition and spontaneity. Dead, starving, or injured animals in dreams are usually depicting the harm that has come to these parts of ourselves.

The horse is a universal symbol of progress, freedom and sexual energy. The dream may be asking you to look at these parts of yourself that you have let die. You shared with me that your sexual life with your husband is non-existent, and though this has been going on for years, it is still a concern to you. You have shared this information confidentially with your friends, just as you pointed out the dead horse to your friends in the dream.

You also shared with me that the dead horse may be the symbol of your inability and unwillingness to make progress and change your life by leaving this difficult relationship.

If the horse is a symbol of the death of your sexual nature or your unwillingness to progress in life, then the dream suggests you are handling these losses quite well emotionally. You experience little or no emotion when you see the dead horse.

I would ask, “Am I denying my own feelings about this issue or have I truly made peace with it?” By being open and honest with yourself, Barbara, you will know the answer.

Tips for readers: Dreamwork is not a process that is logical and linear. It is, at best, an intuitive process that is guided by the dream itself.

When we approach the dream in a goal-oriented way, wanting the “interpretation,” it takes away some of the wonder and magic. Frequently it is by simply “sitting with” the dream in an open, attentive way that the meaning and message reveals itself. This can take hours, or, at times, a few days.

Move through your daily routine, keeping the dream in mind, letting associations and emotions around the dream filter through your consciousness. Keep asking, “Why is this image or character in my dream? What is it trying to teach me? How can I relate this dream to my life?”

Be patient and know that the answers will come.

This column is intended as entertainment. But psychologists who work with clients’ dreams say that dreams can hold a tremendous amount of significance; a particularly disturbing or repetitive dream may indicate the need to see a therapist.

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