Unfortunately, Guitarist’s Forte Is Mostly Deadbeat Riffs

Classical guitarist Leon Atkinson has no one to blame but himself for his current predicament. His father’s body has been on ice for more than a month at Dale Coffelt’s funeral home because Atkinson won’t pay funeral expenses. Normally, something could have been worked out. But Atkinson apparently has stiffed so many Bonner County people that Coffelt sensibly demanded cash up front. Atkinson has been sued at least 17 times by rental companies, grocery stores and credit agencies for nonpayment. Still, he has at least one ally, attorney Tevis Hull. Says Hull: “I don’t care if he doesn’t pay his bills. No one deserves to have a family member held hostage.” Do you suppose Hull will change his tune if Atkinson tries to skip out on him, too?

Larry, Dirk, Mike feed liberally

Hmmm. Funny, how a pay increase tends to make some conservatives forget their principles - U.S. Sens. Larry Craig and Dirk Kempthorne, and U.S. Rep. Mike Crapo, for example. All are Idaho Republicans with American Conservative Union ratings that make Congresswoman Helen Chenoweth look like a moderate. Yet, all voted themselves a raise. On Tuesday, Crapo joined the 220-207 House majority in voting himself a $3,072 raise on top of his $133,600 salary. Then, Craig and Kempthorne stuck their noses into the public trough and did likewise. They were part of a 55-45 Senate majority. By contrast, Chenoweth opposed the sneaky measure. And, on the Kootenai County level, the commissioners denied themselves a raise, too. Said Commissioner Ron Rankin: “I feel we’re doing a darn good job, but I think we’re well-paid for what we’re doing.” Obviously, Larry, Dirk and Mike don’t think a salary seven times as much as the average Idahoan’s is sufficient. What is?

If drafted, I won’t serve

A headline on the Handle front Tuesday shocked subscribers: “Aspirant Olvera vows to keep growth in check.” Stammered one: “It wrecked my morning. It’s bad enough that I have to read your rantings every day.” After spitting out his coffee, My Biggest Fan realized the Olvera running for the Coeur d’Alene City Council isn’t me. Nor is he related. We don’t even spell our names the same way. Manny Olvera’s a Spaniard. I’m Portuguese. Besides, I wouldn’t hold public office - unless I couldn’t find honest work. A stint as a Baptist deacon taught me people are as unruly as sheep. They don’t want to be led. They just want to complain. In fact, this sheep complains more than most. I enjoy it. It beats trying to come up with solutions.

, DataTimes MEMO: D.F. Oliveria’s “Hot Potatoes” runs Tuesdays and Thursdays. You can comment on the items by calling (800) 344-6718 or (208) 765-7125, or by sending e-mail to daveo@spokesman.com.