As Basketball Goes, It Was Bust

The best thing about the National Basketball Association being in town Tuesday night?

How much it made us appreciate it not being here the other 364 days of the year.

Only kidding. Well, mostly kidding.

OK. Busted.

Normally, we’d go out of our way to make nice with NBA basketball, what with it being a distant relative of our favorite great American game (basketball) and a close relative of our second favorite (pro wrestling).

And Spokane’s annual exposure to Sternball is always fraught with the best intentions. Sponsors generously jump in. The promoter kicks in for a worthy cause (Gonzaga University’s scholarship fund). Even the two participating clubs - Portland and Golden State - graciously rearranged their preseason schedules when the Great Pretenders from Seattle couldn’t be bothered with Spokane this year.

Perhaps the theory was to not let the customers start thinking they could get along just fine without an NBA fix, even for a year.

Well, 3,802 bought it - 3,802 who, we’re guessing, will have to be sold that much harder next year.

No disrespect intended. You’re talking to a guy who, in a moment of fiscal weakness, has ponied up in the past for a pair right behind ringside. The kids had to go barefoot for a month, but what the heck.

In any case, the empty seats confirmed what the promoters only suspected: that there’s a market in Spokane for the Sonics, but not for the NBA. At least, not the sub-meaningless, October, preseason, guys-who-played-in-Turkey-last-year NBA. Not at $19.50 for a seat in the attic.

“We want our money back!” came a beery voice midway through the fourth quarter of the Trail Blazers’ 107-88 blowout of the Warriors.

“And then some!” added his buddy.

On the other hand, it was double the turnout of last week’s Seattle Reign exhibition, which was offered at about half the price. Interestingly, when the two genders went back-to-back in San Jose last week, it was the ABL that outdrew the NBA 2-to-1.

Get the Reign and the Warriors in the same building at the same time and you may have a winner.

But it probably won’t be the Warriors.

Only kidding. Well, mostly kidding.

OK. Busted.

The Warriors have a whole season to see if they can become one of the most dreadful teams in NBA history, so it would be cruel and unnecessary to pronounce that mission accomplished on the basis of one lousy exhibition game.

But at 0-6, the portfolio is filling up.

“You’ve got to look at it two ways,” said veteran guard Mark Price. “One, obviously, it’s one of those you’ve got to just throw out and say, OK, let’s start brand new tomorrow. But at the same time you’ve got to learn from it as well.

“But it definitely wasn’t a pretty picture out there.”

Yep. Sixty-one to 32 at halftime is pretty definite.

You can date the demise back to Don Nelson and Chris Webber doing their Roseanne and Tom, but that was three years ago. Now the talent has truly bottomed out. Remaining is Latrell Sprewell, who is terrific, and Joe Smith, who is mostly reliable but who missed as many 2-inchers this night as he did against Gonzaga in the first round of the NCAAs. There is also Donyell Marshall, who somehow wound up with 19 points. Is that what they mean by chump change?

There is even a guy named Duane Ferrell, a forward, who the program said has played nine years in the NBA. We’ve got to pay closer attention.

So the Warriors are starting from scratch, with P.J. Carlesimo resurrected from his firing at Portland in charge. Let’s hope the initials stand for Patience of Job.

“We went back tonight,” said Carlesimo, “way back.”

On the upside, the club has a new logo.

Because the Warriors are what they are, the Blazers were allowed to commit entertainment at appropriate intervals. Portland is a team with intriguing potential, providing management can find a way to outfit Isaiah Rider with The Club.

Rider, he of the Coke can meerschaum, was pulled over for speeding the other night and had his car towed because he had no valid driver’s license. Police dropped him at a 7-Eleven, but perhaps it’s a sign of growth that he isn’t still there playing video games.

We only saw him for 12 minutes, however, which allowed coach Mike Dunleavy to exercise his colts - Jermaine O’Neal, Alvin Williams, Kelvin Cato, good players all. You hope they’ll be OK on a team with such a terrible track record socially - you know, the Jail Blazers and all.

On the other hand, they could be in Seattle, chained to the bench for the crime of being under 30.

The outrageous salaries, the anti-social behavior, the unrelenting hype, the overpriced tickets - all of it can get you pretty sour on Sternball. Then you see B.J. Armstrong do a forward roll just to deliver an assist on a first-quarter fast break and you feel a little better about it.

Just because the game was awful, that didn’t mean either the Warriors or the Blazers were just going through the motions - though that implies motion, not quite accurate when Felton Spencer is at center.

“Nights like this are not fun,” admitted Price, who went 1-for-7 to prove it, “but there’s also a lot of good nights. That’s the good thing about the NBA - we’ve got another game tomorrow.”

For us, next year. Soon enough.

Only kidding. Well, mostly kidding. OK. , DataTimes MEMO: You can contact John Blanchette by voice mail at 459-5577, extension 5509.

The following fields overflowed: CREDIT = John Blanchette The Spokesman-Review